Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In contemporary society, large number of people tend to appoint personal fitness trainer rather than enjoying outdoor sports or doing exercise classes has become an important area of discussion. This trend is primarily driven by lack of knowledge of fitness, and I consider positive outcome outweigh the negative results.

Regarding the first question, the main reason is due to the not having the full knowledge of fitness. This is because people are caught up with their busy work life and hardly get time to play sports outside or learn about the fitness. Lack of information about exercise in the gym could lead to serious health injuries. Therefore, individuals thinks paying an extra money to trainer would help them to stay in a good physique by following their guidelines. As a result, people achieve fitness goals while working full-time, this brings less stress onto their minds and helps them to be more productive at work. For example, in Canada it has widely seen that people hire fitness coaches to learn about how to work on the body muscles by avoiding any physical harm. Hence, hiring an exercise coach would help them to stay active.

Turning to the second question, I firmly believe it has more advantages than disadvantages because obesity is sharply increasing and personal coaches guide their clients about all the essential nutrients our body need to function properly. This is particularly true because they complete certification about healthy lifestyle, understanding the science behind this agenda. Furthermore, eating healthy and staying active in the gym has a longer impact and could increase chances of lifespan. For instance, France has known to be the best active country in the world because people workout regularly has achieved a great influence on individual all over the world by eating healthy food.

In conclusion, recruiting private trainer is largely a result of to stay in a good shape by avoiding any damage to people body. Furthermore, I firmly believe that benefits are large because it helps people to away from getting fat.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for hiring personal trainers and the evaluation of whether this is a positive or negative development. The position is clear throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding 'obesity' and 'nutrients' is a bit generic and could be better supported with more specific, logical links. While the response covers all requirements, the supporting points lack the depth required for a higher band, often relying on repetitive phrasing rather than nuanced analysis.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central topic. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Regarding the first question', 'Furthermore', and 'In conclusion', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'Turning to the second question'. Additionally, there are instances where referencing is slightly unclear, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. Overall, the progression of ideas is logical, but the management of cohesion is not always fluid.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'physique', 'nutrients', and 'certification'. However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and awkward collocations, such as 'appoint personal fitness trainer' (should be 'hire' or 'engage'), 'not having the full knowledge' (wordy), and 'away from getting fat' (informal/imprecise). The range is sufficient for communication but lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that, while not impeding communication, are noticeable. Examples include missing articles ('a personal fitness trainer'), subject-verb agreement issues ('individuals thinks'), and awkward phrasing ('people workout regularly has achieved'). Punctuation is generally functional, but the sentence construction often feels slightly disjointed due to these persistent errors. The control over complex structures is inconsistent, which limits the score in this criterion.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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