Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-18
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
It is often argued that there is an increasing trend of hiring a personal coach among the majority of fitness lovers instead of joining the sports clubs and yoga classes. It is evident that because of increasing work commitments and hectic schedule people may give fee to trainers.
The main reason for choosing a certified instructor is time management. Hiring a trainer keeps an individual to stick with thier timetable for a longer period of time because personal tutor provides better guidance and right pathway to prevent many health diseases. By following this process, people often motivate from their end results and try to stay connect longer with their fitness journey. Moreover, flexibility is an another factor to hire a qualified tutor. Although it is a cheaper option to go with your friends instead of giving plenty of money to trainers, the schedule may become the barrier for some people to stay consistent during training. This sense of autonomy allows people to stay at home due to absence of their loved ones while going fitness gym.
It is a positive trend consits with enormous reasons. People would generate employement for millennials. Office workers would contribute to the nation by hiring young people, which is not only beneficial for creating job opportunities but also get incerdible results in less time. For example, people often get faster results with proper guidance given by tutor rather than spending more hours to get the average results. The hours saved can be allocated to their family, hobbies and their own passion. This would be a balance work-life approach.
To conclude, since it is better to play outdoor games and doing physical activities alone, hiring a instructor saves much time and build consistancy to keep an indiividual fit and healthy with more ease in time flexibility.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for hiring personal trainers and the evaluation of whether this is a positive or negative development. The ideas are relevant, such as time management and flexibility. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat inconsistent. For instance, the argument regarding 'employment for millennials' is a bit tangential and could have been more closely linked to the fitness industry specifically. The position is clear, but the supporting arguments lack depth in places, such as the claim that hiring a trainer is a 'positive trend' because it creates jobs, which is a secondary benefit rather than a primary reason for the fitness trend itself.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. There is an attempt to use cohesive devices, such as 'Moreover', 'Although', and 'To conclude'. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and some transitions are slightly awkward, such as the jump from 'flexibility' to 'autonomy' in the second paragraph. Referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the second paragraph where the connection between 'absence of their loved ones' and 'going fitness gym' is confusing. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the reasons from the evaluation.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to convey their meaning. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary, such as 'autonomy', 'hectic', and 'consistent'. However, there are several instances of awkward collocation and word choice, such as 'give fee to trainers', 'people often motivate from their end results', and 'consits with enormous reasons'. Spelling errors like 'employement', 'incerdible', and 'consistancy' also occur. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding the main points, they limit the score to the 6.0 band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors throughout the text, such as 'people may give fee to trainers' (missing article), 'keeps an individual to stick' (incorrect verb pattern), and 'doing physical activities' (parallelism error in the conclusion). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are minor slips. While the writer attempts complex sentences, the control over them is inconsistent, and errors are frequent enough to be noticeable, though they rarely impede communication. The range of structures is sufficient for the task but lacks the accuracy required for a higher band.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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