Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Trainers are getting hired by people in many countries to maintain their fitness over the outdoor activities. This essay will indicate the causes of such an adoption trend and impact on their health.

The main reason behind hiring someone who will train is personally is more attention. As one is quite busy into their day to day life, they do not have enough time to get indulge into any outdoor sports or exercises. They need someone who can push them to it so. They hired person will focus on their everything from their diet to posture if there is any change needed he will ask the person to perform new strategies. Moreover some people think it is always better results if they will spend money which helps them in such a way that there excitement remains always there. For example if a person pay 15k to someone he will never miss out what experts would say otherwise his money got waste and will always ready to follow the commands even though he do not want to do it. Some of them think that one can not able to get results which ever they aspect unless their is expert advice.

However, they forget the things can get by doing sports or exercise. One can learn qualities like team work, confidence, leadership etc. As while doing those activities he will get enthusiasm from others. Such things are played among different people from whom one can learn many skills and can be professional into their carrier in future. This is best solution for whom who wants the development but into their budget.

At last, it is always good to take experts advice but it is recommended that one should be aware professional as there are a lot of trainers available in market who might harm your body. So unless one is quite sure about them one should not opt for this option at all.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: reasons for hiring personal trainers and an evaluation of whether this is a positive or negative development. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. The reasons provided—lack of time and the need for external motivation—are relevant but could be expanded with more depth. The evaluation of the trend is present, but the argument regarding the benefits of sports (teamwork, leadership) is slightly disconnected from the main topic of personal training. To improve, ensure that the discussion of the 'positive or negative' aspect is more directly linked to the comparison between personal training and other forms of exercise.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'However', and 'At last'. However, the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions feel abrupt. For instance, the transition between the benefits of personal training and the benefits of sports could be smoother. Referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the phrase 'they forget the things can get by doing sports', where the subject is ambiguous. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the introduction, body, and conclusion.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and variety required for a higher band. There are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice, such as 'get indulge into', 'his money got waste', and 'professional into their carrier'. While the meaning is generally clear, the range is limited, and there is a reliance on basic vocabulary. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise collocations and academic vocabulary related to health and fitness, while ensuring that word forms are used correctly in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the reader's flow. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('he do not want', 'there is expert advice'), incorrect verb forms ('one can not able to get'), and missing articles or prepositions. While the meaning is usually understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher level of accuracy. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for common grammatical slips would significantly improve the clarity of the writing.

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