Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-18
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In Today`s fast-paced world, the individuals hold diverse opinions on a wide range of topics. Regarding the issue of hiring personal fitness tutor, opinions are divided, with some supporting it while others oppose it. In my view, this is a positive development because avoiding risk of injuries and flexible schedule.
Those who supports my point of view argue that hiring own fitness trainer gives chance of flexible schedule due to busy lifestyle.
This perspective is based on the belief that not only people can give time to their health, also family as they can do their classes anytime due to having personal trainer. For Example, If a person is doing job that far form home like takes 1-2 hours, he or she wouldn`t have enough time for family. Additionally, Supports assert that avoiding risk of any injuries because people would be trained intinally not like just doing exercises without knowing its proper instruction, which further strengthens the case for this position.
Furthermore, another reason to support this view that some people are introvert or shy. This viewpoint highlights the potential risk associated not to asking questions without any fear as they may know each other better personally than taking classes in groups. For instance, due to over-weight, some people are not confident to do join classes in front of others, or to do their 100% contribution. Therefore, it is clear that hiring personal trainer may people more confident and trustable, emphasizing the strengthens of this choice.
In conclusion, The debate surrounding arranging own fitness tutor is multifaceted, with valid arguments to consider. while some people may disagree, I think that its benefits are much more stronger than drawbacks. Hence, the sooner the people understand the value of hiring personal fitness trainer, the better it is.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for hiring a personal trainer and the evaluation of whether this is a positive or negative development. The position is clear from the introduction. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the points regarding flexible scheduling and injury prevention are relevant, the explanation regarding introversion is slightly repetitive and lacks depth. Some arguments, such as the mention of 'trustable', are not fully explained in the context of fitness training. To reach a higher band, ensure that each supporting point is fully explored with more precise reasoning rather than relying on general statements.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Furthermore', 'For instance', and 'In conclusion', though some are used mechanically or with slight inaccuracies, such as 'Supports assert' instead of 'Supporters assert'. Referencing is generally clear, but the flow between sentences is occasionally interrupted by grammatical errors that make the connection between ideas slightly strained. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward word choices or incorrect collocations, such as 'hiring personal fitness tutor' (should be 'hiring a personal fitness trainer'), 'doing job' (should be 'working a job'), and '100% contribution' (should be 'full effort'). While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of sophisticated vocabulary and the presence of errors in word formation limit the score. Expanding your range of topic-specific collocations would significantly improve your performance.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the reader's flow. Common issues include missing articles ('hiring personal fitness tutor'), incorrect verb forms ('Those who supports'), and awkward phrasing ('avoiding risk of injuries and flexible schedule'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of backticks instead of standard apostrophes. While the meaning is usually understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and article usage would be beneficial.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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