Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

There is an ongoing trend in my countries where people prefer to hire personal fitness coach instead of playing sports or get enrolled in exerscise classes. I believe this is a positive development because fitness trainers help their clients to achieve their fitness goals and make sure to reverse certain disease.

One of the major advantages of hiring fitness trainers is that clients can achieve their goals systematically. This is because trainers keep clients motivated and help them to create personalized routines which make their clients' lifestyle healthy. Since clients are receiveing constant movitations and personalized diet and exercises, clients can work on their fitness consistency. For example, many personal fitness trainers keep motivating their clients by sending motivational quotes daily assessment sessions at the end of the day. This shows that hiring a personal fitness trainer is really make the fitness journey seamless.

Qualified fitness trainers can provide right guidance to cure diseas by improving lifestyles. Based on the personal fitness coaches, many patients have solved their high blood presure problem by improving their diets and doing regular cardio. For example, many organizations organize campaigns to solve diabetic proble. Many patients enrolled on these type of camps where each patients assinged with their persona fitness trainers. These trainers help to improve patients' lifestyle. As a result, patients can effectively manage their diabetic disease. Therefore, fitness trainers are not only improve people's lifestlyes but also make sure to manage serious diseases.

To conclude, although people have replaced sports and excerise classes with personal fitness trainers, this change is positively impact on people's health and make their life diseases free.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for hiring personal trainers and the evaluation of whether this is a positive or negative development. The position is clear from the introduction and maintained throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat repetitive. While you mention motivation and health management, the arguments could be more varied. For instance, you could have discussed the social aspect of group classes versus the individual attention of a trainer. The examples provided, such as the mention of diabetic camps, are relevant but could be more specific to demonstrate a deeper understanding of the trend. Overall, the task is addressed, but the depth of analysis is limited.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. There is a clear progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'One of the major advantages', 'For example', and 'Therefore', to link your points. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly repetitive. Additionally, there are instances where referencing is slightly unclear, such as in the second paragraph where the transition between motivational quotes and the conclusion of that paragraph feels a bit abrupt. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to convey your meaning clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'personalized routines', 'cardio', and 'diabetic'. However, there are several spelling errors, such as 'exerscise', 'movitations', 'presure', and 'lifestlyes', which detract from the overall quality. Furthermore, some word choices are slightly unnatural, such as 'reverse certain disease' or 'make the fitness journey seamless'. To reach a higher band, you should aim for more precise collocations and ensure greater accuracy in spelling and word formation.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow of reading. Examples include 'people prefer to hire personal fitness coach' (missing article), 'clients are receiveing' (incorrect verb form), and 'this change is positively impact' (incorrect tense/passive voice). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are minor errors throughout. The frequency of these errors suggests that you have not yet achieved consistent control over complex structures, which is necessary for a higher band score.

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