Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-21
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In some countries people hire personal fitness trainer, rather than playing traditional sports or doing regular gym exercise. This trend can be attributed to several factors like personalised fitness training gives better results and healthy life. I think this is a positive development because this adopts a healthier lifestyle and that creates a better productivity and creativity but it may not be affordable to everyone.
There are several reasons why people choose personalised trainers. Firstly, a personalised trainer can create fitness charts and goals. They can prioritize the fitness activity according to the individual physical structure and that follows a proper diet. The personalised trainer can give one-to-one focus which can produce great results. Moreover, individuals with their busy lifestyle prefer personalised trainer because they can provide flexible schedule that can fit around their personal and official commitments.
Another reason, a personalised trainer will always be committed to their goals , so they can generate a better productivity. For example in many corporate sector, personalised trainer have been hired because their employees spend long time sitting in front of desk so they can provide some basic exercise where the employee can focus and generate better results.
I think personalised training is always good. Getting training from professional experts is always better rather than struggling in gym with daily exercise. However, it is important to know that personalised trainer are highly expensive not everyone can afford. Therefore, affordable options like community training centres should be available for common people.
In conclusion, personalised training is the best option for the individuals who have the financial capacity but its outweigh that not everyone can afford so a balance approach to be taken for the development of a better healthy society.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for hiring personal trainers and the evaluation of whether this is a positive or negative development. The position is clear throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the explanation of why trainers improve productivity is a bit repetitive, and the example regarding corporate sectors could be more specific. While the main points are relevant, they lack the depth required for a higher band score. The conclusion provides a balanced view, which is good, but the overall argument could be more nuanced to fully explore the implications of this trend.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, each with a clear focus. There is a progression of ideas from the reasons for the trend to the evaluation of its impact. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Firstly', 'Moreover', and 'In conclusion', though some transitions feel a bit mechanical. Referencing is generally clear, although there are occasional minor issues with pronoun usage and sentence flow. The paragraphing is appropriate and contributes to the overall readability of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to convey their meaning clearly. There is an attempt to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'personalised fitness training', 'physical structure', and 'financial capacity'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are some awkward collocations, such as 'generate a better productivity' instead of 'increase productivity' or 'improve productivity'. The repetition of the phrase 'personalised trainer' throughout the text suggests a limited range of synonyms, which prevents a higher score in this criterion.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('a personal fitness trainer' vs 'personal fitness trainers') and subject-verb agreement ('personalised trainer are highly expensive'). Some sentences are slightly clunky, such as 'its outweigh that not everyone can afford'. While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. More attention to pluralization and article usage would improve the accuracy significantly.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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