Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Focusing of fitness is an hour of need for every human being in this contemporary times and this issue is gaining maximum traction all over the world. There are certain parts of the world where majority of their citizens are having their own fitness trainer instead of going out to play outdoor activities in order to maintain their level of fitness. In my opinion, it is negative development for a various reasons which will be explained in the upcoming paragraphs.

There are multiple reasons why people are hiring personal trainer. Firstly, People are nowadays too busy in their schedule and not having enough time to get together with their friends to play some outdoor games. In other words, each friend has their different work schedule, some of them are doing morning shift and rest of are in night shift due to not having similar timings they can not play sports. Another vital factor is that, people feel more convenient by doing exercise than going out. That is to say, person can select their own schedule to arrange the sessions with trainer and he/she can have perfect to do list which allow them what to eat and what to do for maintaining their fitness. Moreover, They can focus more their weak body area easily by getting assitant from trainer.

There is a plenty of reasons why i believe that not playing outdoor games and focusing only on gym is not a positive development. The foremost one is that, following same routine can be a boring task for each of us. To be more precise, if people have to do similar activities each week of day then they will feel bore and the level of motivation will get down week by week and at the end, a time will come when they give up on their health. Secondly, playing outdoor games not only prominent for health but it also helps people to develop their personal growth in terms of skills such as team coordination, team spirit, decision making and developing network with people to become successful person.

To sum up, even though focusing more on personal gym has been great for physical development, what i believe that giving equal importance to personal fitness and doing activities with people can not only develop people level of fitness but also helps them to their cognative development by building network with the people.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for hiring personal trainers and the evaluation of whether this is a positive or negative development. The position is clear from the introduction. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the reasons for hiring trainers (convenience, scheduling) are well-explained, the discussion on why it is a negative development could be more deeply explored. The argument regarding 'boredom' is valid, but the link between personal training and the loss of social skills could be supported with more specific examples or a more nuanced analysis to reach a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Firstly', 'Another vital factor', and 'To sum up', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and there are instances where referencing is a bit unclear, such as 'due to not having similar timings they can not play sports'. The flow between sentences is generally smooth, but the essay would benefit from a more sophisticated range of linking words to improve the overall cohesion.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express ideas clearly. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary, such as 'contemporary times', 'traction', and 'cognitive development'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'Focusing of fitness is an hour of need' (should be 'a necessity'), 'prominent for health' (should be 'beneficial'), and 'personal gym' (should be 'personal training'). These errors do not impede communication but prevent the essay from reaching a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is usually clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('a personal trainer', 'the hour of need'), subject-verb agreement ('majority of their citizens are'), and preposition usage ('focus more their weak body area'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some run-on sentences and missing commas that affect the readability. The control of grammar is sufficient for a 6.0, but more attention to detail and error correction is needed to move into the 7.0 range.

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