Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is an undeniable fact that health is real wealth. In recent years, an increasing number of individuals are hiring a personal fitness trainer for staying healthy instead of making involvements in playing sports and attending exercise classes. Since it offers tremendous benefits to people such as giving a chance to remain fit, it is considered as a positive outcome for the society.

To begin with, people are interested to hire their own fitness trainer because they have hectic schedules. As they are doing highly professional jobs, they have very demanding work hours especially those live in big cities and they have less time to participate in exercise classes. Moreover, some people have lack of knowledge about playing sports. They are not only less interested in games but also have a fear to get injured while playing a game. As a result, they usually hire a physical fitness specialist in order to remain in a good shape.

Furthermore, it is a optimistic approach for the individuals because if individuals do not partake in exercises, they may become unhealthy, and may experiences ironic health issues such as heart diseases. Eventually, hiring a trainer provides a chance to have active lifestyle to individuals. To cite an example, the job of personal trainers is gaining popularity in many countries because they give guidance to busy people about physical activities which can be done in homes, and a health diet plan in terms of adding more rich foods in meal.

To conclude, although people do not make efforts to play sports, they still manage to remain healthy by appointing a personal health trainer.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for hiring personal trainers and the evaluation of whether this is a positive or negative development. The ideas are relevant, such as time constraints and fear of injury. However, the development is somewhat limited. For instance, the discussion on why this is a positive development is brief and lacks depth. The argument could be strengthened by contrasting the benefits of personal training with the social or community aspects of sports classes. The position is clear, but the supporting arguments would benefit from more detailed explanation to reach a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Moreover', 'Furthermore', and 'To conclude' are used to guide the reader. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly repetitive. Referencing is generally clear, though the flow between sentences could be smoother. The paragraphing is appropriate, and the progression of ideas is easy to follow, meeting the requirements for a band 6.5 or 7.0 level of organization.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express ideas clearly. There are some attempts at less common collocations, such as 'hectic schedules' and 'demanding work hours'. However, there are instances of awkward phrasing or incorrect word choices, such as 'making involvements in' (instead of 'participating in') and 'ironic health issues' (which is misused). The range is sufficient to convey meaning, but the lack of precision in some areas prevents a higher score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'people are interested to hire' (should be 'interested in hiring'), 'some people have lack of knowledge' (should be 'lack knowledge'), and 'a optimistic approach' (should be 'an optimistic approach'). Punctuation is generally correct, but the frequency of minor grammatical slips indicates that the writer has not yet achieved the control required for a higher band.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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