Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In some countries, there has been a surge in a trend where people are hiring personal fitness trainers instead of doing exercises or playing sports. According to me, desire to achieve attractive physical looks among the youth can be one of the reasons for the same. In this essay, I will also share what can be the positives and negatives development of it.

The most significant reason for this trend can be the craving for better physical looks among the people. This can ultimately lead to better confidence , which can reflect in overall aspects of the individual. Moreover, hiring a professional guide person with them helps them sticking to the plan and get desired physique with less chances of injuries. Additionally, going to gym is very flexible in time as it is a solo activity and you do not have to depend on anyone. For example, If someone lacks motivation, their trainer can motivate and help him push his limits in his journey.

On the other hand, some positive developments of fitness trainer over sports going to gym is very flexible as it is a solo activity and you do not have to depend on anyone. You can also pin point train the muscle which needs the most attention. In contrary to that, actively participating in sports can help you achieve better lean muscle which means muscle that is more useful in this day to day life. The muscle build via sports is more flexible too, which ultimately leads to better performance, less injury prone body and healthier cardio vascular system.

In my opinion, having an hybrid approach is the most optimal way where a person can gain flexible lean muscle from sports and then can hire a trainer to pin point muscle training where it is lacking.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, identifying reasons for the trend and discussing whether it is a positive or negative development. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the reasons for hiring trainers are clear, the discussion regarding whether this is a positive or negative development is slightly muddled. The essay shifts between describing the benefits of trainers and the benefits of sports without explicitly weighing the two sides to reach a clear conclusion. To improve, ensure that the 'positive or negative' aspect is explicitly argued rather than just listing features of both activities.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or repetitive. For instance, the phrase 'In this essay, I will also share' is a generic introduction, and the transition between the second and third paragraphs is abrupt. Some sentences, such as 'In contrary to that', are slightly awkward in their linking function. While the paragraphing is sufficient, the internal cohesion within paragraphs could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words to connect arguments more fluidly.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express ideas clearly. There are some attempts at less common collocations, such as 'cardio vascular system' and 'push his limits'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice, such as 'professional guide person' instead of 'professional trainer' or 'fitness coach'. Additionally, the phrase 'pin point train' is not standard English. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey meaning, it lacks the precision and sophistication required for a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'going to gym is very flexible' (missing article), 'helps them sticking to the plan' (should be 'helps them stick'), and 'The muscle build via sports' (should be 'The muscle built'). Punctuation errors, such as the space before the comma in 'confidence ,', also occur. While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. A greater focus on subject-verb agreement and article usage would be beneficial.

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