Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-31
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In A few nations, most of the individuals trying to employ a personal trainer instead of participating in games and working on physical activities. According to me, there are some reasons behind this phenomenon and it is a good progress.
There are some causes regarding this statement. Most of the individuals do not have enough time to focus on themselves because of hectic schedules.with the help of them, they get trained on time and stay more focused.Moreover,regular sessions encourages more to follow rules and use the equipment correctly. This not only means to target goals but also avoiding the risk of injuries. Otherwise, they can get worse results by doing excessive training.
According to my opinion, this is a good progress.but there is some negatives too.Personal trainers can be costly, everyone cannot afford them. For instance,these days people are suffering from the higher rates of everything, due to inflation.It decreases self-motivation because they just do training until the coach is with them.Individuals may get loose stamina to exercise by themselves.
In conclusion,there are more reasons in the side that it a positive outcome but we cannot deny the negatives such as
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you address both parts of the prompt—the reasons for hiring trainers and the evaluation of whether it is a positive or negative development—the discussion is underdeveloped. The conclusion is incomplete, cutting off mid-sentence, which prevents a clear summary of your position. To improve, you must expand your arguments with more detailed explanations and specific examples, ensuring that each paragraph contributes to a fully developed response that meets the length requirement.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical flow is hindered by the lack of development and the abrupt ending. While you use some cohesive devices like 'Moreover' and 'For instance', the transitions between ideas are sometimes mechanical or unclear. The incomplete conclusion significantly disrupts the overall coherence of the piece. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words to connect your ideas more fluidly and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence followed by supporting evidence and a concluding thought.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is generally adequate for basic communication but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You rely on simple phrasing such as 'good progress' and 'some reasons'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'get loose stamina' and 'higher rates of everything'. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to the topic, such as 'professional guidance', 'financial constraints', or 'long-term physical autonomy', and ensure that your word choices are contextually accurate.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There is a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but the accuracy is inconsistent. You have frequent errors in punctuation, such as missing spaces after periods (e.g., 'schedules.with') and incorrect capitalization. There are also grammatical slips, such as 'regular sessions encourages' (subject-verb agreement) and 'there are more reasons in the side' (preposition error). To improve, focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy, particularly subject-verb agreement and sentence boundaries, and practice constructing more complex sentences with correct punctuation.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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