Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Nowadays most of countries, raising a hiring more personal trainers than playing sports or doing exercise classes. Main reason this is because doing training with personal trainers more effective and less effect for injury of the body.in my opinion it is a negative development

Using with personal trainers as a fitness trainer can get more result and less injury rather than attending sports or doing exercise classes.by personal trainers guiding us effective diet plan and convenient technology effective way for weight loss or manage of the body. Also when doing exercise or sport wrong exercise, effect for injury of the body, but using proper iding reduce the damage of our body and can get result immediately.occacinaly we are playing some sport or doing exercise classes t is time and money wasting .because of using wrong technique .

using with personal trainer most effective way for who want to get more result quickly it is a positive outcome, Nowa days busy life style more and more people attending to gym, I think it is more effective doing exercise with trainer. He can identified your weekness,strength ,and wrong technique method ,and also he may guide you until your result with less injury.

in conclusion using personal trainer more effective than participate sports or doing exercise classes .it is positive development who are want to get result quiekly

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you identify reasons for hiring personal trainers (effectiveness, injury prevention) and state your position, the arguments are repetitive and lack depth. The explanation of why this is a negative development is contradictory, as you later describe it as a positive outcome. To improve, you must ensure your position is consistent throughout the essay and provide more detailed, well-supported examples to fully address the prompt. The under-length nature of the response prevents a higher score as the task is not fully developed.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay lacks a clear logical progression. Paragraphing is inconsistent, and the transition between ideas is often abrupt or confusing. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'in conclusion' and 'also', but they are often used mechanically or incorrectly, such as starting sentences with 'Using with' or 'by personal trainers'. The referencing is frequently unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow your argument. To improve, focus on using clear topic sentences for each paragraph and ensure that cohesive devices are used to link ideas naturally rather than just acting as sentence starters.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive, relying on basic terms like 'effective', 'result', and 'exercise'. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'raising a hiring' instead of 'hiring' and 'less effect for injury' instead of 'lower risk of injury'. Some phrases are non-standard, which occasionally impedes the flow of communication. To achieve a higher band, you should aim to use a wider range of vocabulary related to fitness and health, and focus on using words in their correct context to express your ideas more precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The grammar is characterized by frequent errors in sentence structure, subject-verb agreement, and article usage. Many sentences are fragmented or lack a clear subject, such as 'Main reason this is because...' and 'He can identified your weekness'. There is a lack of complex sentence structures, and the errors present often make the text difficult to read. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring every sentence has a clear subject and verb, and proofreading for common errors like missing articles and incorrect verb forms.

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