Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In recent years, so many people are resorting to getting professional fitness trainer other than following classes, this maybe due to lack of motivation and support

there are several reasons for renting a fitness instructors. one of such reason if motivation. several persons might loss focus during the course of the training and will ability to self motivation. people who tend to use an online classes and lack the physical support of a trainer loses focus very fast on the process of body building. Moreover the dietary routine of someone who is under training can even drift from keeping to requirement to not caring for what not to eat.

on the other hand , if an instructor fall ill and leading to being physically challenged training might even stop leading to waste of money hired time

furthermore, recently it is now common to see instructor to become physically attracted to the trainee lead to intimate and sexually abused, such moment are not health for the individual and putting one at risk of diseases. for instance, several complains have shown that instructors now abuse trainee in so many parts of the counties

in conclusion, bringing a personal trainer can have so many added advantages such as

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response4.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you identify reasons for hiring a trainer, the discussion is underdeveloped and lacks depth. The second part of the prompt—evaluating whether this is a positive or negative development—is not addressed, as the essay ends abruptly before providing a clear position or conclusion. To improve, ensure you address all parts of the prompt equally and provide sufficient supporting examples to meet the length requirement.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay lacks a clear logical structure. Paragraphing is inconsistent, and the transition between ideas is often abrupt or missing. While some cohesive devices like 'Moreover' and 'furthermore' are used, they are sometimes applied mechanically or incorrectly. The essay ends mid-sentence, which disrupts the overall flow and coherence of the argument. To improve, focus on using clear topic sentences for each paragraph and ensure that your ideas follow a logical progression from introduction to conclusion.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is generally limited and repetitive. There are several instances of awkward word choices and incorrect collocations, such as 'renting a fitness instructors' instead of 'hiring a personal trainer' and 'sexually abused' used as an adjective rather than a verb. Some phrasing is imprecise, which occasionally hinders the reader's understanding. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use a wider range of topic-specific vocabulary and focus on correct word forms and collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues (e.g., 'instructor fall ill'), incorrect article usage, and sentence fragments. The range of structures is limited, and the errors often cause the reader to pause to decipher the intended meaning. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing commas and capitalization errors. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence structures and proofreading for common errors like pluralization and verb tense consistency.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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