Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Last two decades have seen enormous changes in healthy life. Some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. According to me it is negative development. I will give more details with appropriate example further.

In recent time people are more conscious for their health. But, they do not want to play any physical game. They like to join a fitness club and hiring trainer. They believe If they join the gym then they become more fit. Instead of that they play any physical game. For instance, Football, cricket, basketball, and many other. If some one play this game they become mentally and physically strong then hiring trainer. people do not about the game. who it is pay vital role in our life. that game give us how to survive in difficult time in our life.

In addition, Some countries thinks if we have more fitness trainer so we can canvasing fitness related knowledge. and aware country people how fitness is very crucial for our life. Usually, people not habituated with gym and fitness trainer. Instead of that If they join some physical sport club that will be good for their routing life and gradually they become habituated with this game. and they become more fit.

Conclusion, Some countries hiring more and more fitness trainer but they do not know about how human body work in this era. they should add one game in their routing life. and they become mentally and physically more fit and healthy.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, identifying reasons for hiring personal trainers and expressing a clear negative opinion. However, the development of ideas is limited. The reasons provided—such as people wanting to be fit without playing sports—are somewhat repetitive and lack depth. The argument that sports teach life skills is a good point, but it is not fully explored or supported with concrete, logical evidence. The response tends to over-generalize, and the connection between the reasons and the conclusion is weak. To improve, you should expand on your arguments with more specific examples and ensure each paragraph contributes clearly to your overall position.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is often disjointed. While some cohesive devices are used, such as 'In addition' and 'For instance', they are often applied mechanically or incorrectly. For example, the transition 'Instead of that' is used repeatedly and inappropriately. The referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the logic between sentences. Paragraphing is present, but the internal structure of the paragraphs lacks a clear topic sentence and supporting flow. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each sentence logically follows the previous one will significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive, which restricts your ability to express complex ideas. There are several instances of awkward word choices and incorrect collocations, such as 'canvasing fitness related knowledge' and 'habituated with gym'. Basic vocabulary is used throughout, and there is little evidence of less common lexical items or idiomatic language. To reach a higher band, you should focus on learning topic-specific collocations (e.g., 'sedentary lifestyle', 'tailored fitness regime') and work on using a wider variety of synonyms to avoid repeating words like 'game' or 'trainer' throughout the text.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'Some countries thinks'), article usage (e.g., 'hiring a personal fitness trainer' vs 'hiring personal trainers'), and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or lack proper punctuation, such as 'Conclusion, Some countries hiring...'. While there is an attempt to use complex structures, they are often faulty, leading to confusion. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring that your subjects and verbs agree, and practicing the correct use of articles and prepositions in a variety of contexts.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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