Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

A personalized health regimen can help an individual maintain perfect fitness. Nowadays, individuals prefer a personalized coach instead of attending group exercise classes or exercising outdoors. This essay will explain the potential reasons why I consider this a positive development.

People are choosing private trainer for various reasons. To begin with, having a coach that only focuses on you in your time helps them monitoring one's health individually. This can not only help them observe the personal progress, but also alert them when something goes wrong. That means early rectification of a diet or fitness plan can be done to keep the progress on track. For example, If the amount and duration of exercise is not enough for an individual, a trainer will catch it early to modify. Also, people who wanna train for future gaming competitions need to well-maintain their physical health. Having a coach can help them to reach their fitness goals faster.

In my opinion, this is a positive development. Sometimes when people exercise outside without any strict supervision, they can hurt themselves without knowledge. A small tear from an extra set of exercise can harm an individual in future if it was not treated on time. So, having a trainer who is focused on your self can help prevent such things. Moreover, fitness coaches go through extensive tests of their knowledge to get their certification, and having professional train you can help one in many ways.

In conclusion, while having personal coach can be quite expensive, I still believe that they can help an individual maintain good physical health and reach their fitness goals.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for hiring personal trainers and the evaluation of whether this is a positive or negative development. The position is clear throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding 'gaming competitions' is a bit tangential and not fully linked to the broader trend of personal training. The reasons provided, such as safety and individual monitoring, are relevant but could be expanded with more specific examples or deeper analysis to reach a higher band. Overall, the response is well-focused on the task requirements.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the reasons from the evaluation. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Moreover', and 'In conclusion' are used to guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and there are minor issues with referencing, such as the use of 'them' in 'helps them monitoring', where the antecedent is slightly ambiguous. Despite these minor issues, the progression of ideas is clear and easy to follow throughout the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are some attempts at less common vocabulary, such as 'rectification' and 'regimen', which are used correctly. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'wanna' (informal), 'well-maintain' (awkward phrasing), and 'focused on your self' (should be 'yourself'). While these errors do not impede communication, they prevent the response from reaching a higher band. A wider range of precise, academic vocabulary would improve the score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'having a coach that only focuses on you... helps them monitoring' (subject-verb agreement and gerund usage) and 'If the amount and duration of exercise is not enough' (should be 'are'). Additionally, there are punctuation errors, such as the unnecessary capitalization of 'If' in the middle of a sentence. While the meaning remains clear, the frequency of these errors suggests a need for more careful proofreading and a stronger grasp of complex grammatical structures.

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