Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Nowdays, many of opeople doing activity like to join the gym and and extra work to have p[personal traineer in fitness center, sometime it is positive development personally i prefer to do activity like yoga and exerices at your home as go to personal fintness center trainer.

Firtsly, we should do this for our fitness snd for our helthy but today generation have one kind of traind like to show up if one person can join the fitness center than they also join and work out but they do not know how to work out in our busy life schedule in routine what kind of food you will be eat on which time daily activity how much time you spend in excercise in so many kind of reason so it one kind of negative impact for it like wast of money i thinkk so.

Secondly, rather than playing sports od doing exericse classes or at home is beeter for you just because it provide to you physicaly and mentally gowrth to your mind and your body so i prefer this. For example, like do everyday yoga and play cricket in our school or with your friend its one kind of exercise or doing our classes exercise in school its same kind of to hiring a personal fintness traineer. So, i recommended to do daily rotuine activity to do with your own way don't wast money and your personal time.

In conclusion, people are increasingly hiring personal fitness trainers because of personalised programmes, flexibility and motivation. Overall, I believe this is a positive development because it can encourage people to exercise regularly and maintain a healthier lifestyle.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, acknowledging the trend towards hiring personal fitness trainers and attempting to discuss reasons alongside a personal perspective on whether this is positive or negative. However, the development of ideas is limited and at times confusing. For instance, the student mentions that people hire trainers to 'show up' and notes a potential negative impact like 'wast of money,' but these points are under-developed and lack clear articulation. Furthermore, there is a notable contradiction between the body paragraphs—where the student argues that home exercise and school sports are better and hiring trainers is a waste of money—and the conclusion, which suddenly states that hiring trainers provides personalised programmes, flexibility, and motivation, and is a positive development. This shift undermines the consistency of the position throughout the task, placing the response firmly at Band 5.0 according to the descriptors.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5

The text is organized into paragraphs, including an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the logical progression is frequently disrupted by run-on sentences and poor cohesive devices. For example, the second paragraph consists of one extremely long, convoluted sentence connected by multiple conjunctions ('and', 'than', 'what kind of', 'so') which makes the flow difficult to follow. Referencing is also unclear in places, such as in the phrase 'one kind of traind like to show up if one person can join the fitness center than they also join'. Paragraphing is present, but internal cohesion is mechanical and inadequate, leading to a coherence score of 4.5.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, frequently impeded by severe spelling and word-choice errors. Examples of errors include 'Nowdays', 'opeople', 'p[personal traineer', 'fintness', 'helthy', 'traind', 'gwoowth', and 'wast'. The student attempts some less common terms like 'personal fitness trainer' and 'busy life schedule', but inaccuracies are pervasive ('what kind of food you will be eat on which time'). The lexical range is minimally adequate for conveying basic intent, but the density of errors places this response at a Band 4.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

Grammatical control is weak throughout the response. The text is characterized by an absence of accurate complex sentence structures, featuring instead long, run-on simple and compound sentences that lack proper punctuation. There are frequent errors in verb tense and agreement, such as 'many of opeople doing activity like to join', 'what kind of food you will be eat', and 'it provide to you physicaly and mentally gowrth'. Punctuation is largely neglected, with sentences running together without proper periods or commas. These frequent errors frequently impede communication and place the response at a Band 4.0.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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