Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this modern era, many individuals prefer to hiring a personal fitness trainer instead of playing sports. In this essay, I will discuss the reasons for this trend. I believe that it is a mor0e positive than negative development.

There are several reasons for hiring personal trainer. First and Foremost is busy schedule. To explain this, most people do long shifts due to this they don't able give a time to their health. They like to eat junk food instead of healthy food because it saves their time. As a result, people has prone to health disorders such as obesity. For instance, most celebrities prefer to hire personal trainer to maintain their physical health. Another major reason is that everyone have different kind of body and interests. People able to get good guidance by hiring personal trainer.

While, one main benefit of this trend is that it increases employment rate because most people able complete their basic needs by doing this job. So, it helps decrease burden of government. Furthermore, people will get physical fit which they will feel energetic and enjoy to do a work. For instance, most individuals don't do long shifts because of health issues. As a result, people may able to earn more money.

However, one main drawback is that wastage of money because they pay a lot of money to hire a personal trainer and they will also get dependent on others.

In conclusion, people hire a trainer because of busy schedule and maintain good health which it helps increase unemployment rate and get special guidance.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing both the reasons for hiring a personal trainer and whether it is a positive or negative development. The writer takes a clear position ('I believe that it is a more positive than negative development'). However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and uneven. While reasons such as busy schedules are introduced, the explanations are occasionally brief or tangential, such as the sudden mention of celebrities. Furthermore, some arguments regarding the economic impacts are slightly confused or underdeveloped. Overall, the task is addressed adequately, fitting the criteria for Band 6.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is divided into paragraphs, which helps structure the response, and there are basic attempts at logical progression and linking (e.g., 'First and Foremost', 'Furthermore', 'However', 'In conclusion'). However, cohesion is frequently mechanical and sometimes faulty. For instance, transitional phrases are occasionally awkward ('While, one main benefit...'), and referencing is unclear in places, such as the pronoun use in 'doing this job' or 'enjoy to do a work'. Paragraphing is used, but the internal flow within paragraphs is disjointed due to grammatical errors and abrupt transitions, placing this performance at Band 5.5.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The student uses an adequate vocabulary for the task, successfully communicating everyday ideas related to fitness, health disorders ('obesity'), and lifestyle ('busy schedule', 'junk food'). However, there are noticeable limitations and word choice errors, such as 'prefer to hiring', 'people has prone', and 'wastage of money'. Attempts to use less common vocabulary are constrained by awkward collocations or morphological errors. The lexical range is minimally adequate to convey the message, but inaccuracies prevent it from reaching a higher band, aligning with a Band 5.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but control over grammar is weak. There are frequent, persistent errors throughout the text, including missing auxiliary verbs ('they don't able give a time'), subject-verb agreement issues ('everyone have different kind'), and incorrect verb forms ('people will get physical fit'). Punctuation and article usage are also problematic in several sentences. Because these errors occur frequently and occasionally impede smooth reading, the grammar score is Band 5.0.

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