Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In today's world fitness has become a most important part of everyone's life. Being fit is really important for a good health. As food habits and daily routines are changing, people are really finding it hard to be fit and healthy. In most of the countries, mostly in urban areas each member of the family is working and stay out of their house for about 8-10 hours, due to which most of the time they don't find time to cook at home and eventually they have to eat outside. People are living in nuclear families nowadays so there is no one at home to cook for them. Frequent eating outside food is causing diseases where fitness become necessary

Due to their busy schedules most of the people don't find time to join gym, yoga classes, etc, so they prefer to hire personal fitness trainers who can provide sessions at home or online. This also help people to achieve their fitness goals quickly. Also, mostly females prefer to hire personal trainers as they find it easy and comfortable. Females mostly in small cities don't prefer to go to gyms or attend crowded sessions, they feel uncomfortable doing that so they usually hire personal trainers.

Also, due to lack of time or fixed work schedule, people don't find time to play any sports so it become their necessity to hire personal trainers. People who works mostly in IT sectors or any private sector have flexible shift timings and working hours, they also don't have fixed leaves and holidays so it is difficult for them to manage any exercise classes or sports having fixed opening and closing time. They hire trainers who can easily manage according to their flexibility.

It is a part of positive development as through this working professionals able to manage their fitness along with their jobs and stay healthy. I want to share an example from my experience, I am an IT prfessional working in 9 hours of shift which is flexible so I don't find anytime for myself. I joined gym classes but couldn't able to manage going because of my flexible shift timing so I had to hire a personal trainer with whom I managed to be fit and healthy.

So I would like to conclude my reasoning of hiring a personal fitness trainer here.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both the reasons for hiring a personal trainer and giving a clear position that it is a positive development. Ideas are relevant, but some are under-developed rather than fully extended. For instance, the point regarding female preferences in small cities is introduced but not fully explored with sufficient depth. Similarly, the initial discussion on eating habits leading to health issues is slightly tangential to the core question of why personal trainers are preferred over gyms or classes. To reach a higher level, the writer needs to fully develop each supporting argument with more precise and expansive explanations rather than relying on brief generalisations.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear stance stated towards the end. Paragraphing is utilised to separate the main ideas, such as busy lifestyles, female preferences, rigid work schedules, and the personal evaluation. However, referencing and cohesion are at times mechanical or repetitive, particularly with the frequent starting of sentences with 'Also' and 'So'. While the logical flow is mostly maintained, the transitional devices lack variety and sophistication. To improve in this area, the writer should employ a wider range of cohesive phrases and ensure smoother links between sentences to guide the reader seamlessly through the argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The writer demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as 'nuclear families', 'flexible shift timings', and 'working professionals'. However, there are noticeable limitations and inaccuracies in word choice, collocation, and word form. Examples include phrases like 'eating outside food' instead of 'eating out', 'stay out of their house' instead of 'away from home', and the misspelling 'prfessional'. These errors do not seriously impede communication, reflecting a solid middle-level performance, but they highlight a lack of precision. To achieve a higher band, the writer must expand their lexical repertoire and use less common vocabulary with greater awareness of natural collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an ability to construct multi-clause sentences using subordinating conjunctions like 'due to which' and 'where fitness become necessary'. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, such as missing articles ('becoming a most important part', 'to join gym'), subject-verb agreement issues ('People who works'), and tense consistency ('it become their necessity'). Fortunately, these errors rarely impede communication and the meaning remains clear throughout. To move further up, the writer needs to increase the proportion of error-free complex sentences and exercise tighter control over grammatical structures and articles.

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