Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In western countries, the demand of a personal fitness trainer is increasing rapidly compared to joinning any sports club or exercise sessions. Clearly, It is neigther positive nor negative development. In the forthcoming paragraphs, I have discussed reasons behind this situation with suitable justification, and also, I have stated my opinion at the end.

Taking into account, the first and foremost reason behind this trend is that it provides adjustable timings according to busy and rudimentary lifestyle of people. Offering them all benefits of exercise while balancing both professional and personal life together, personal training becomes more affordabel and convenient alternative for people. Besides, mitigating the travelling time, personal training is the best option for coorporate employees.

Moreover, personal training is more affective compared to public gym and sports clubs as trainer can attend a person at a time, providing all efforts and hardwork after that person rather than dividing his/her focuss among group of people. Cherry on the cake, coaches or tuitors in this department are highly educated with certified degrees and achievements. Thus, apart from coaching, in addition, they will manage entire system of healthy eating by structuring a whole diet plan.

I believe, from client perspactive, personal training outweigh the benefits of sports and exercise classes. However, from other point of view, there has some hidden issues like how to fullfil the excessive demand of personal tuitor for each family?

To recapitulate, personal training is more convenient by providing freedom of time for professional employees and other extra benefit such as maintaining diet plans.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question by giving reasons for the rise in personal training and stating a view. Convenience, flexible scheduling, reduced travel, individual attention and diet planning are relevant points. However, your position is not fully consistent: the introduction calls the development “neither positive nor negative,” while the later paragraph says personal training “outweigh[s]” sports and classes, which suggests a positive judgement. The reasons are also unevenly developed. For example, you mention busy lifestyles and corporate employees but do not explain these points with a specific example, and the concern about meeting demand is raised without being connected clearly to your overall evaluation. Make your position explicit and support each main reason with a brief explanation or example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two paragraphs explaining reasons, a paragraph giving your view, and a conclusion. The sequence is generally easy to follow, and linking expressions such as “Moreover,” “However,” and “To recapitulate” help signal the stages of the argument. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent organisation and shows some flexibility in connecting ideas. At times, though, the links feel formulaic or the relationship between points is unclear. “Cherry on the cake” does not smoothly introduce the point about trainers’ qualifications, and the final paragraph repeats convenience and diet planning rather than drawing together the evaluation. Use more precise transitions and make the conclusion reflect the position established in the introduction.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “adjustable timings,” “professional and personal life,” “certified degrees,” and “diet plan.” Some less common expressions show ambition, but inaccurate spelling, word forms and collocations are noticeable and sometimes make the reader pause: “affordabel,” “coorporate,” “focuss,” and “personal perspactive” are examples. Phrases such as “rudimentary lifestyle” and “providing all efforts and hardwork after that person” do not express the intended meaning naturally. This keeps the vocabulary from being consistently clear and appropriate. Prioritise accurate, natural combinations over decorative idioms, and check spelling and word forms carefully. For instance, “flexible schedule” and “individual attention” would express your points more precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a participial opening (“Taking into account…”) and a subordinate clause beginning “as trainer can attend a person at a time.” The main ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors occur in sentence construction, agreement, articles and punctuation. For example, “personal training outweigh the benefits” needs subject–verb agreement, while “there has some hidden issues” has an incorrect verb pattern. The opening sentence also uses an awkward comparison structure, and several commas interrupt the flow between clauses. Work on building complete, well-controlled sentences and check agreement and article use. A clearer version of the comparison would be: “More people are hiring personal trainers instead of joining sports clubs or exercise classes.”

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