Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In some countries, instead of playing sports or joining exercise classes, people are considering personal fitness trainer. The prominent reasons are the guidence of expert to maintain health with safety and personalized coaching lead towards certified trainer instead of general activities. I believe this is a positive development as individuals are not relying on typical exercise and online resources which can be harmful to them without a proper guidence.

To begin with the reasons, these days, people are more aware about their healthy lifestyle and to stay fit and safe, more and more are considering certified personal fitness trainer which provides personlized diet plan, particular exercise depend on the requirements and how to use euipment safely to avoid injuries. Although generally it is not possible to improve health steadily and safely, private coaching helps achieve goals quickly. Coaching of diet meals is one of the important parts of healthy body. Trainers usually provide charts of diet plan and calories according to person's body which can help achieve goals faster. Similarly, excerise plans and calories intake charts from professional enhance health.

Moreover, it is definately a positive development because individuals are priortizing their safety and avoiding severe injuries which can be happened while doing physcial activities without proper knowledge and guidence. Many people have injured themselves while doing excerise or activities they learned from online videos or websites. These kind of mistakes can lead to severe injuries including death as well. For instance, One of the famous body builder from India died because of doing exercise in a wrong way. This can be avoided by consulting fitness trainer who understand the body types and required exercise.

In conclusion, People are choosing personal trainers not only becuase they provide a suitable approach of diet and training plan but also a guidence to avoid any kind of injuries that can be life threathning.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both parts of the question: you explain why people choose personal trainers and clearly state that you see this as a positive development. The points about tailored exercise and diet plans, safer equipment use, and avoiding injuries are relevant, and the example of a bodybuilder in India supports your safety argument. The response also maintains this position in the conclusion. However, the reasons are developed more fully than the broader evaluation of whether this trend is positive; the benefits are asserted, but possible limitations, such as cost or reduced social interaction, are not considered. Some claims, including that coaching helps people reach goals quickly and that mistakes can lead to death, would benefit from qualification or clearer support. More balanced development would strengthen the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph explaining reasons, a paragraph supporting your view, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “To begin with,” “Moreover,” and “In conclusion” helps readers follow the main stages, and the central position remains consistent. This gives the essay a coherent progression. At times, however, the links between ideas are mechanical or unclear. For example, “Although generally it is not possible to improve health steadily and safely” does not connect logically to the following point about private coaching. The first body paragraph also repeats the ideas of diet plans, exercise plans, and achieving goals without clearly distinguishing them. Use more precise referencing and develop each paragraph around a distinct point to make the cohesion more flexible.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “personal fitness trainer,” “personalized diet plan,” “calories,” “injuries,” and “body types,” so the reader can understand the subject and your main ideas. There are also attempts at more specific expressions such as “prioritizing their safety” and “life-threatening.” However, spelling errors and inaccurate or unnatural word combinations are noticeable, including “guidence,” “personlized,” “euipment,” and “diet meals.” Phrases such as “coaching of diet meals” and “particular exercise depend on the requirements” are difficult to interpret naturally. Some vocabulary is also repeated, especially “exercise,” “guidance,” and “goals.” Check spelling carefully, learn common collocations, and vary repeated terms to make your meaning more precise and fluent.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses beginning with “Although,” “because,” and “which,” and the overall meaning is generally understandable. Some sentence patterns are controlled, such as “This can be avoided by consulting fitness trainer,” though this example also needs an article. Other errors affect clarity or accuracy: “particular exercise depend on the requirements” has problems with number and verb agreement, while “injuries which can be happened” uses an incorrect passive construction. There are also issues with articles and sentence boundaries, as in “One of the famous body builder from India died,” and inconsistent capitalization after full stops. Work on agreement, articles, and passive forms, then proofread punctuation. More accurate complex sentences would help demonstrate a wider range with better control.

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