Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Happening in many other countries, people who go to the gym or fitness junkies are now more interested in hiring a personal fitness coach, instead of joining classes or any sort of sports. In my opinion, I believe this is a positive development; however, I still think it depends on the person's needs or goals when it comes to their physical health, and what they prefer that could benefit them the most.

As a fitness enthusiast myself, I hired a personal coach to help me as my accountability partner to help me achieve my dream body goals. Coaches assess body fat and muscle and do a trial workout to check our capacity to work out before giving the full plans for the rest of the sessions. It was a great experience for me to have my own personal trainer, as she knows which workouts will work best for me. Additionally, for instance, after my one-hour session, she does a cool-down by stretching my body, and it was my favorite part. Also, some other coaches even give you tips for a meal plan, not just exercises. A whole holistic approach that is truly effective in more people's lives.

Whereas playing sports or doing classes is a huge difference; you are doing it on your own, even doing some exercises with a group, some forms are not corrected, that caused injury if not assisted properly, especially for those just begginners in their fitness journey.

So for me, the positive outweighs the negative when it comes to personal trainers because their professionalism and skills cannot be compared to any other workouts or sports.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear: you consider personal trainers a positive development, while acknowledging that the best choice depends on individual needs. You also give relevant reasons, including tailored workouts, accountability, injury prevention, and meal-planning advice, and your personal experience supports these points. However, the response addresses the reasons for the trend less fully than its benefits: it does not explain clearly why more people are choosing trainers, such as convenience, motivation, or access to individual guidance. The comparison with sports and classes is also brief, and the claim that people exercising in groups are effectively “on your own” needs qualification. Develop both sides of the question more evenly and explain how each example supports your overall judgement.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction states your view, the body paragraphs discuss personal training and group exercise, and the conclusion restates your judgement. Ideas such as assessment, tailored workouts, and nutrition advice are grouped together, which helps the reader follow your main point. However, progression is sometimes weakened by mechanical or unclear links. “Whereas” begins a fragment rather than a complete contrast, and “Additionally,” “Also,” and “for instance” cluster around examples without always showing how they relate. The sentence “A whole holistic approach…” is also disconnected from the preceding explanation. Use complete topic sentences and clearer links between reasons, examples, and evaluation to make the argument flow more smoothly.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “accountability partner,” “assess body fat and muscle,” “capacity,” “cool-down,” and “holistic approach.” These choices help convey specific aspects of personal training, and the meaning is generally clear. Some expressions are informal or imprecise for an IELTS essay: “fitness junkies,” “dream body goals,” and “a huge difference” do not express the ideas as precisely as they could. There are also collocation and spelling slips, such as “some forms are not corrected” and “begginners.” Aim for more consistent academic phrasing and check word forms and spelling. More precise vocabulary for the reasons people hire trainers would also help you explain the trend rather than mainly describe your own experience.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and more complex forms, including a conditional-style qualification (“it depends on the person's needs or goals”) and a relative clause (“which workouts will work best for me”). Most sentences communicate the intended meaning, but some grammatical problems remain. “Happening in many other countries” is an incomplete opening construction, while “A whole holistic approach that is truly effective…” is a sentence fragment. In “that caused injury,” the clause does not fit smoothly with the preceding sentence, and the shift from “she does” to “it was” in the account of the session is inconsistent. The sentence beginning “Whereas” also needs a main clause. Practise complete sentence structures and maintain consistent tense when describing past experiences; these changes would improve accuracy without sacrificing variety.

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