Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Well almost every individual is becoming fitness freak due to more number of diseases.In this modern era,it is become very popular among individuals to hire personal fitness couch,inspite of indulging in sports or exercise classes.although,there are plethora of factors behind this trend,in my opinion it is a negative development.

to begin with the reasons of opting for personal fitness professionals.the primary reason is convenince,as hiring personal couch for gyming is quite effortless as compared to playing sports.to exemplify,private fitness trainee can assist inhabitants according to their schedule at day or night time.another factor behind this is less hardship.to simplify,personal tariner can aid person in lifting upthe weight machines or any exercise equipment which involves less hardwork as compared to do sports .lastly,diet charts are also the reason of choosing personal fitness professional.to illustrate,individuals can easily manage their diet with the help of diet technician which is cumbersome in case of just playing sports without any private trainee.

conversely,there are plenty of negative effects of not doing sports due to growth of personal fitness trainers among people.firstly,it make individuals dependent.When,fitness freaks will more attached to fitness trainers even for small exercises it can make them dependable on them;which reduces their physical capability.secondly,sports can become less prominent between people.for example,there are number of sports activities such as badminton,basketball which are declining day by day.along with that, famous sports may not be pefered by uocoming generations.

consequently,eventhough personal fitness trainee assist individuals in many useful way,but i strongly believe that this is negative enhancement.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question: convenience, help with equipment and diet advice are offered as reasons, and your conclusion clearly states that you view the trend negatively. The examples of trainers working around clients’ schedules and sports such as badminton and basketball make the response relevant. However, some points are asserted rather than fully explained. For instance, the claim that personal training makes people dependent and reduces their physical capability needs a clearer explanation of how this happens. The point about sports becoming less prominent is also broad and would benefit from a specific link between hiring trainers and reduced participation. Develop these ideas with fuller reasoning or a concrete example to make your position more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction, a paragraph on reasons, a paragraph on negative effects, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “to begin with,” “firstly,” and “secondly” help readers follow the main points, and the contrast between reasons and drawbacks is clear. This meets the lower-band expectations and shows some features of stronger progression. However, linking is sometimes mechanical, with several points introduced by formulaic markers, and some connections are unclear—for example, the move from personal trainers to the decline of particular sports is not fully explained. Improve cohesion by linking each example directly to the claim it supports and using clearer referencing, rather than relying mainly on list-like transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt topic-related vocabulary, including “personal fitness trainer,” “diet charts,” “physical capability,” and “sports activities,” so the reader can generally understand the subject. However, the range is limited and several noticeable word-choice, collocation, and spelling errors make parts less natural or occasionally difficult to interpret. Examples include “fitness couch,” “less hardship,” “diet technician,” and “negative enhancement”; these do not express the intended ideas accurately. Spelling and word forms such as “convenince,” “pefered,” and “uocoming” also need careful editing. Build a reliable set of natural expressions for discussing exercise and health, and check collocations and spelling before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “as,” “which,” and “even though.” This gives the response some structural variety, and the main message is usually recoverable. However, control is uneven: errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries recur. For example, “it is become very popular” needs a correct verb form, while “it make individuals dependent” has a subject–verb agreement error. The sentence beginning “When, fitness freaks…” is also awkwardly punctuated and structured, and several sentences run together without appropriate capitalisation or punctuation. Practise accurate sentence patterns and proofread for agreement, verb forms, and sentence boundaries while retaining your attempts at complex structures.

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