Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In many countries, it is becoming increasingly common for people to hire personal fitness trainers rather than play sports or attend group exercise classes. This trend is largely driven by the desire for personalised guidance, individual attention and faster results without social distractions. However, I believe this is a negative development because playing sports and participating in group exercise classes can offer greater physical and social benefits.

To begin with, in the competitive world, peer pressure to look more physically attractive may compel the indiviual to go beyond their comfort zone. Therefore, hiring personal fitness trainer will provide them personalised guidance and healthy diet chart. Furthermore, another reason could be that introvert individuals don't want te be socially distracted from other people which leads them to have their own fitness trainer to provide individual attention. Furthermore, people find it difficult to spare some time for themselves because of heavy workload and no work life balance, with the professional trainer guidance, they will feel motivated.

Secondly, this is the negative development because it is often seen that playing sports and participating in group exercise classes can offer greater physical benefits to them. A combined approach such as regular physical activity and joining exercice classed will have long-term benefits to individuals. In addition to this, individuals' will be socially present when they meet new people which eventually help them to reduce stress from their employment. For instance, senior roles and heavy workload will lead to no or little time for their social life which leads to stress and anxiety.

In conclusion, although hiring personal trainer will provide them personal guidance for healthy living and focus on balanced diet but I beleive focusing on playing sports and joining exercisses classes will have greater significance in their lives for healthy living and reduce stress.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question: you give reasons for hiring trainers, including personalised guidance, privacy for introverted people, and motivation, and you clearly state that you consider the trend negative. Your contrast with the social and physical benefits of sports and classes is relevant. However, some points are asserted rather than explained. For example, the link between peer pressure to look attractive and hiring a trainer could be clarified, and the claim that group activities offer greater physical benefits needs a specific explanation or example. The workload point is also introduced but not fully connected to why a personal trainer is preferred. Develop each main reason with a clear cause-and-effect explanation and support your position more directly.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph explaining reasons, a paragraph presenting your view, and a conclusion. The position is easy to identify, and signposts such as “To begin with,” “Secondly,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the main stages. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical, particularly with repeated “Furthermore” and repeated references to “which leads.” Some links between ideas are not fully clear: the discussion moves from workload to trainer motivation, then to the benefits of group exercise without a strong transition. The example about senior roles and stress would fit more naturally if its connection to social exercise were made explicit. Use fewer formulaic connectors and build clearer links between each claim and its supporting explanation.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “personalised guidance,” “individual attention,” “balanced diet,” “workload,” and “stress and anxiety.” These phrases help communicate the main ideas, and some topic-specific language is used appropriately. There are, however, several inaccurate or awkward choices that reduce precision, such as “socially distracted,” “peer pressure to look more physically attractive,” and “socially present.” Spelling errors in “indiviual,” “exercice,” “classed,” “beleive,” and “exercisses” also show that word forms are not consistently controlled. Aim for more natural collocations and proofread carefully; for example, explain that people may prefer one-to-one support or want to avoid exercising in a group.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses with “because,” “which,” and “although,” and the overall meaning remains clear. Some sentences are controlled, such as “This trend is largely driven by the desire for personalised guidance, individual attention and faster results.” However, some grammatical errors remain. Articles are missing in “hiring personal fitness trainer” and “with the professional trainer guidance,” while “individuals' will be socially present” uses an unnecessary apostrophe and has an awkward construction. The final sentence also has an unclear “although” clause followed by “but.” There are some issues with agreement and clause structure, as in “which eventually help them.” Review articles, possessives, subject–verb agreement, and how to form contrast clauses, then proofread sentence boundaries and punctuation.

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