Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

Nowadys, majority of people are interest towards fitness due to which they hire gym trainer instead of getting classes about sports or prefer excercise by themselves. However, they want to get knowledge to gain or loose weight. I think it has both postive and negatives which i will elborate in upcoming paragrahps.

To start with, the main reason why people choose fitness trainer is they can focus the body to give the shape. In sport, they need proper team but in gym they can do excercise by using different equipment on the behalf of the trainer knowledge.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

You identify a relevant reason for hiring a trainer—people want to shape their bodies—and you begin to compare gym training with sport. However, the response addresses the task only minimally: it does not explain the reasons in sufficient detail, and the claim that the development has “both postive and negatives” is not followed by an explanation of either side or a clear overall judgement. The comparison about needing a team for sport is also not developed with an example or explanation. The response is 97 words, so it does not meet the required minimum of 250 words. To improve, explain several reasons, evaluate whether the trend is positive or negative, and support each main point with relevant examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: an opening introduces the topic and a second paragraph begins with “To start with,” to present a reason. This gives the reader some sense of direction. However, the response ends before the argument can progress, and the promised discussion of both positive and negative effects never appears. The opening sentence also combines several ideas—interest in fitness, hiring trainers, and weight change—without clearly showing how they relate. Use separate paragraphs for the reasons and your evaluation, and connect each point with clear explanation. A concluding paragraph that restates your position would make the overall progression more complete.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “fitness trainer,” “sports,” “weight,” and “equipment,” so the subject is generally recognisable. However, the range is narrow and several word choices or forms are inaccurate, which makes parts of the meaning unclear. For example, “interest towards fitness” is not a natural collocation, and “on the behalf of the trainer knowledge” does not clearly express the intended idea. There are also spelling errors such as “Nowadys,” “excercise,” and “postive.” Build a more precise set of phrases for discussing exercise and its benefits, and check spelling and collocations carefully. The suggestions below offer more natural alternatives.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both a longer opening sentence and a reason introduced by “why,” showing some effort to use more than simple statements. However, sentence structures are limited, and errors in agreement, articles, and sentence construction occur repeatedly. For instance, “majority of people are interest” needs a determiner and a correctly formed adjective, while “they can focus the body to give the shape” has an unclear grammatical relationship between the actions. The phrase “I think it has both…” also lacks a clear reference for “it.” Practise building accurate subject–verb patterns and use shorter, complete sentences when expressing complex ideas. Then add a range of correctly controlled complex sentences.

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