Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-30
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In this contemporary era, there has been a rapid increase in the number of individuals who are hiring personal fitness coach and avoiding to play outdoor games and doing workout classes.I think this is a positive tendency.
To begin with, one of the significant reason is that personal fitness trainer has more knowledge about workout and exercise. To explain, personal gym coach knows numerous physical exercise to gain as well as loss weight and to maintain physical posture of body. For example, in developed countries like Canada most of the obese people hire their own instructors to lose their body fat and obesity. Thus, it is an excellent way to keep trainer to maintain body fitness and healty body.
Apart from this, keeping own gym trainer is beneficial for people as individuals becomes more disciplined to achieve their heath related goals as they have in person classes and workouts. To justify, by joining gym regularly on the class time makes individual more conscious toward their health. To cite an example, youngsters join early morning training classes of workouts and learn different body exercises to maintain good body physique. As a result, gym instructors make their clients more obedient and the skills like punctuality even in their daily life.
To recapitulate, hire in person gym instructor has numerous merits to keep people physically fit and healty that is the reason that it become trend to take training and do workouts under the guidance.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5
You give a clear opinion that hiring a trainer is positive and provide two relevant reasons: trainers’ exercise knowledge and the discipline created by regular sessions. The examples about people seeking weight loss and young people attending early-morning classes support these points. However, the task asks both why this trend is growing and whether it is positive or negative. Your reasons mainly describe benefits, rather than explaining why people increasingly choose personal trainers over sports or group classes; this leaves the first part only partly addressed. Several claims, such as trainers making clients “more obedient,” are also not fully explained. The response is 8 words below the required minimum, which further limits the development of your ideas. Explain the causes of the trend directly and extend each point with clearer reasoning or a specific example.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction states your view, two body paragraphs present separate benefits, and a concluding paragraph restates your position. Linking phrases such as “To begin with,” “Apart from this,” and “As a result” help signal the stages of your argument. However, some connections are mechanical, and the progression within paragraphs is not always clear. For instance, the first body paragraph moves from trainers’ knowledge to weight loss and then to maintaining fitness without fully showing how these points explain the growing preference for personal training. The conclusion also repeats the main claim rather than drawing the reasons together. Make the cause-and-effect links explicit and use pronouns or transitions carefully so each idea clearly follows from the previous one.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use a reasonable range of topic-related vocabulary, including “physical exercise,” “maintain,” “disciplined,” and “punctuality,” and the reader can generally understand your meaning. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “significant reason” and “to justify.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, including “keeping own gym trainer,” “loss weight,” “heal(t)hy body,” and “body physique.” Spelling errors such as “healty” and “heath” also reduce accuracy. These issues do not usually prevent understanding, but they make the writing less precise and fluent. Learn common collocations for fitness and employment, and check spelling and word forms during proofreading.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “as” and “that,” and your main ideas are usually understandable. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly with articles, agreement, plurals, and verb forms. For example, “one of the significant reason” needs a plural noun, while “personal fitness trainer has” needs an article or plural subject. In “individuals becomes more disciplined,” the subject and verb do not agree, and “it become trend” has an incorrect verb form and missing article. Punctuation also needs attention: there is no space after the first full stop before “I think.” Practise checking each sentence for a clear subject and correctly matched verb, then review articles and sentence boundaries.
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