Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Nowadays, In certain countries, more individuals are hiring a private fitness trainer rather than gaming sports or exercise classes has become a major discussion around the world. In my opinion, I highly agree the personal fitness trainer is more crucial than to playing sports, because it will give positive to development to people and society.

On the one hand, the reason why i support this personal fitness trainer is because it will give more beneficial to all the players and teaches more exercises development in the classes. For instance, personal trainers are more important to give and share their a lots of knowledge where their built to study about fitnesses and they are learned in a long years to be a professional trainer fitness and that is not easy they have to study in every details to become a professional trainor fitness and to share in all players in the sports that is why more countries are looking to hire for a qualified personal fitness trainer. Furthermore, personal traner is a highly indemand in all the countries and pay for high salary. Moreover, because not all people interested in that kind of profession instead of more and more player in the sports.

On the other hand, theres a lot of players than to small amount of trainers are really needed so players are really needed to develop their phisical, mind, endurance, health, stamina and others needed to apply for the players. For example, the companies in all the countries who they represent players to compete in any games around the world is personal fitness traners is a must for those players to develop their abilities to calm their mind until to start their compition in games.

In conclusion, personal trainers is a vital that to a lot of players and players are really needed to development their fisical fitness and i believe trainers one of the top priorities in all countries because of less amount of personal trainers to develop their players.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

Malinaw na mas gusto mo ang mga personal trainer at natukoy mo ang ilang kaugnay na dahilan, kabilang ang kanilang kadalubhasaan at suportang ibinibigay nila sa mga atleta. Gayunman, bahagya lamang nasasagot ng sagot ang tanong: hindi nito malinaw na ipinapaliwanag kung bakit mas pinipili ng ordinaryong tao ang mga trainer kaysa sa sports o mga klase sa ehersisyo, at napupunta ang malaking bahagi ng talakayan sa mga propesyonal na manlalaro at mga bansang kumukuha ng mga trainer. Binanggit mo na positibo ito, pero hindi mo ipinaliwanag nang nakatuon kung paano ito nakabubuti sa mga tao at sa lipunan. Halimbawa, hindi naipapakita ng puntong mataas ang demand sa mga trainer at malaki ang kinikita nila kung bakit positibo ang kalakarang ito. Bumuo ng mga dahilang tuwirang naghahambing sa one-to-one na pagsasanay at mga panggrupong aktibidad, saka suportahan ang pananaw mo sa pamamagitan ng tiyak at malinaw na ipinaliwanag na mga halimbawa.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

May panimula, dalawang talata ng katawan na sinisimulan ng “On the one hand” at “On the other hand,” at konklusyon ang sagot, kaya makikilala ang pangkalahatang estruktura nito. Ipinakikita rin ng ilang pariralang nag-uugnay, gaya ng “For instance” at “Furthermore,” na sinisikap mong pagdugtungin ang mga ideya. Gayunman, hindi bumubuo ng malinaw na pangangatwiran ang mga talata: palipat-lipat ang una sa kadalubhasaan ng mga trainer, mga kwalipikasyon, suweldo, at demand, samantalang nakatuon ang ikalawa sa mga atleta at kompetisyon nang hindi malinaw na inihahambing ang dalawang panig. Paulit-ulit o malabo ang ilang pang-ugnay, at mahirap sundan ang mga pagtukoy gaya ng “that kind of profession.” Ayusin ang bawat talata sa paligid ng isang pangunahing dahilan, ipaliwanag ito nang sunod-sunod, at gumamit lamang ng mga pariralang nag-uugnay kapag nililinaw ng mga ito ang ugnayan ng mga ideya.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

Sinubukan mong gumamit ng bokabularyong may kaugnayan sa fitness at sports, kabilang ang “endurance,” “stamina,” “qualified,” at “professional,” na nagpapakitang pamilyar ka sa paksa. Gayunman, limitado ang lawak ng bokabularyo at hindi wasto o di-natural ang maraming piniling salita at kolokasyon, kaya kung minsan ay mahirap unawain ang nais mong sabihin. Kabilang sa mga halimbawa ang “gaming sports” para sa paglalaro ng sports, “give positive to development,” at “a lots of knowledge.” Paulit-ulit din ang mga maling baybay, gaya ng “traner,” “phisical,” at “compition,” na nagpapababa sa linaw ng sagot. Sikaping matutuhan ang mga karaniwang pariralang partikular sa paksa bilang buo-buong yunit at maingat na suriin ang baybay. Makakatulong ang mas eksaktong pananalita para maipakita ang pagkakaiba ng personal training at panggrupong ehersisyo, at para mas madaling maunawaan ang mga dahilan mo.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

Sinubukan mong gumamit ng ilang mahahabang pangungusap at mga batayang pang-ugnay para magpahayag ng mga dahilan at halimbawa, pero hindi palagian ang pagkontrol mo sa estruktura ng pangungusap. Pinagsasama ng ilang pangungusap ang mga ideya nang walang malinaw na ugnayang panggramatika, gaya ng “more individuals are hiring a private fitness trainer rather than gaming sports or exercise classes has become a major discussion.” Madalas ding hindi wasto ang pagkakasundo ng mga salita at anyo ng pandiwa: halimbawa ang “personal trainers is a vital” at “they are learned in a long years.” Hindi pare-pareho ang paggamit ng malaking titik at bantas, at mahirap sundan ang ilang pangungusap dahil pinagdurugtong ang mga sugnay nang walang malinaw na hangganan. Magsanay munang bumuo ng wastong payak na mga pangungusap, saka magdagdag ng mga sugnay na may malinaw na simuno at pandiwa. Suriin ang pagkakasundo ng mga salita, mga pantukoy, at mga hangganan ng pangungusap habang nire-rebisa.

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