Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

the baar chart illustrates the australian gender in six ages groups they attemped the daily exercise in the year of 2010, shows in the percentages.

overall, the majority of youngsters men were highest level however the the young ladies were slightly slow in all group. furthermore, the old both majority were similarly remained.

in the begning , the people in the age 15 to 24, men were incresed then the women the male percentage at the poient 52.8 however the ladies poient 47.7.on the otherhand the ladies in the age of 25 to 34 decreased while the male were high in percentage 48.9.in the age of 35 to 44 ladies slowly downed but the men rose up the figher at 52.5 on peek poient. in the stages 45 to 54 boys were increased then the girls.

forthermore , in level of 55 to 64 men slowly down however, the women gradually upward .hence, in the stages of 65 both majority exercise activity level samed equal.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the chart’s subject and make an attempt to describe differences across the age groups, including the male figure of 52.8% for ages 15–24 and the female peak of 53.3% for ages 45–54. However, several comparisons are misreported: women do not remain lower in all groups, and the figures for ages 25–34 and 35–44 are assigned to the wrong genders. The overview that “youngsters men were highest” also misses the main pattern: men lead only in the youngest group, while women lead in every other group; male participation falls and then rises, whereas female participation generally rises before falling. Select the key trends accurately and support them with correctly matched figures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has an opening, an overview, and a body that moves through the age groups, so there is some organisation. However, the progression is difficult to follow because comparisons and figures are not consistently linked to the correct group or gender. Connectors such as “on the otherhand,” “furthermore,” and “hence” are used, but some do not express a clear relationship between the ideas that follow. The overview also repeats unclear claims rather than guiding the reader through the main trends. Group the data into a clear comparison—for example, the youngest group where men are higher, followed by the five groups where women are higher—and use straightforward linking phrases to show contrasts and changes.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to describing a chart, including “percentage,” “age,” “increased,” and “gradually,” and the reader can recognise that you are comparing activity levels. However, the range is limited and many choices or forms are inaccurate, making several statements hard to interpret. Phrases such as “the australian gender,” “young ladies were slightly slow,” and “the figher at 52.5 on peek poient” are not natural ways to describe the data. Spelling errors, including “begning,” “incresed,” and “forthermore,” also reduce clarity. Build a small set of accurate chart expressions, such as “the proportion of men,” “was higher than,” “reached a peak,” and “declined,” and check spelling before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

There is an attempt to form longer sentences and use time and comparison clauses, but control is weak and errors frequently make the relationships between ideas unclear. For example, “the people in the age 15 to 24, men were incresed then the women” has an incomplete and confusing structure, while “the male percentage at the poient 52.8 however the ladies poient 47.7” lacks a clear verb and appropriate punctuation. Articles, plurals, agreement, and verb forms are also inconsistent, as in “both majority exercise activity level samed equal.” Use short, complete sentences first: “Among 15–24-year-olds, 52.8% of men exercised regularly, compared with 47.7% of women.” Then add a few controlled contrast clauses.

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