Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-07-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Th bar chart compare information about the percentage of Australian men and women who have different age group and did physical activity regularly in 2010.

Overall, the percentage of physical activity carried out higher in around 25 to 64 age of Australian women than men. However, the highest percent of men found in younger people at approximately 52.8%.

In 2010, 52.8 percent of 15 to 24 age of men did regular physical activity, while only 47.7% did by women. Following after, in 25 to 34 age of people were doing 48.9% of men and 42.2% of women. Subsequently, the proportion of women increased up to 52.5% at age of 35 to 44 years. The highest percent of women found in age of 45 to 54 years, it was 53.3%, while in men 43.1%.

Now, it was time too change scenario. Around 45.1% of 55 to 64 year old men did regular exercise. In contrast, women ration slightly decline around 53%. Finally, 65 or above years of people were doing exercise mostly similar at approximately 46.7% in men and 47.1% in women.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the task requirements by summarizing the main features of the bar chart. You have identified key trends, such as the higher participation rates for women in middle age groups and the peak for men in the youngest category. However, the report lacks a clear, concise overview paragraph that synthesizes the data effectively. Some data points are presented in a list-like fashion, which hinders the analytical quality of the summary. To improve, ensure you group data logically rather than describing each age bracket sequentially, and focus on highlighting the most significant comparisons between genders across the age spectrum.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or awkward, such as 'Following after' and 'Now, it was time too change scenario'. These transitions do not flow naturally within an academic report. While there is a logical progression from younger to older age groups, the internal cohesion within paragraphs could be improved by using more varied linking words to connect the data points. Referencing is generally clear, but the overall flow is slightly disjointed due to the repetitive sentence structures.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing you to convey the basic information. You use terms like 'proportion', 'percentage', and 'regular physical activity' correctly. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice, such as 'women ration' instead of 'women's rate' and 'mostly similar' instead of 'comparable'. The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited and relies heavily on repeating the same structures. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more precise synonyms and collocations related to data description, such as 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', or 'a significant disparity'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include 'Th bar chart compare' (subject-verb agreement), 'in 25 to 34 age of people' (prepositional/phrasing error), and 'time too change' (spelling/word choice). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are persistent throughout the text. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of prepositions when describing age groups and percentages. Proofreading for basic errors like 'too' vs 'to' will also help improve your accuracy.

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