Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-03
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The data illustrated the proportion of Australian male and female in different number of group in regular physical activity in 2010.
Overall, Female are higher in number in the physical activities which is slightly bigger in the ratio from males.
Female, at age from 45 to 54 has the biggest percentage which is 53.3%, contrasting the largest physical activity in overall. While male from 35 to 44 has the lowest physical activity which was 39.5%.
On the other hand, young age individual was doing the most physical activity for both genders, from 15-24. The ratio was 52.8 for male and 47.7 for female.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement score. While you have identified some key features of the data, the analysis is incomplete and lacks the depth required for a higher band. You have selected some relevant data points, such as the 45-54 age group and the 15-24 age group, but the overall summary is underdeveloped. To improve, ensure you provide a more comprehensive overview of all age groups and make more detailed comparisons between the genders across the entire chart. The current length prevents a full development of the response.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response is organized into short paragraphs, but the logical progression is hindered by the lack of sufficient content. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Overall', 'On the other hand', and 'While', but they feel somewhat mechanical. The referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the second paragraph where the comparison between genders is vague. To improve, focus on creating smoother transitions between sentences and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear, unified focus. The limited length makes it difficult to demonstrate a sophisticated use of cohesive devices.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is somewhat limited and repetitive. Phrases like 'higher in number', 'biggest percentage', and 'lowest physical activity' are basic and lack the precision expected for an academic task. There are also issues with word choice, such as 'different number of group' instead of 'different age groups'. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use a wider range of vocabulary related to data description, such as 'proportion', 'percentage', 'fluctuate', 'peak', and 'marginal'. Avoid repeating the same structures and try to incorporate more precise terminology to describe the trends shown in the chart.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. For example, 'Female are higher in number' should be 'Females have a higher participation rate'. There are also issues with subject-verb agreement and article usage, such as 'young age individual was doing'. The sentence structures are relatively simple, and there is a lack of complex sentence forms. To improve, focus on using a variety of sentence structures, including complex sentences with subordinate clauses, and pay closer attention to pluralization and verb tense consistency. Proofreading for basic errors will also help improve your accuracy.
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