Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-05
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The bar chart illustrates the proportion of Australian people in various age categories who did daily physical workout in 2010.
Overall, the percentage of female's activity was higher than men except several age groups while men's ratio was fluctuated among all the years.
Looking more into the graph age groups between 15 to 44 the men had the highest proportion of 52.8% initially but than men levels were down. Additionally, than 35 to 44 age women was highest than men it was 52.5 just near to young age groups. But in the middle ages the proportion of women was 48.9 more than men that was 42.2.
On the other hand, the remaining older ages the proportion was again higher towards women. People from 45 to 54 the female proportion w
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement. The summary is incomplete, as the text cuts off mid-sentence, leaving the data analysis unfinished. While you have identified some main features, such as the general trend of female participation being higher, the lack of a complete overview and the failure to cover all data points prevent a higher score. To improve, ensure you provide a comprehensive summary that covers all age groups and complete your sentences to provide a full report of the data presented in the chart.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay shows some attempt at logical organization, with an introduction and a body paragraph. However, the progression of ideas is hindered by the incomplete nature of the text. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Additionally' and 'On the other hand', but they are sometimes used incorrectly or in a way that makes the flow mechanical. Paragraphing is present, but the abrupt ending makes it difficult to assess the overall structure effectively. To improve, focus on using transition words more naturally and ensure that each paragraph has a clear, completed focus.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward phrasing, such as 'daily physical workout' instead of 'regular physical activity' and 'female's activity' instead of 'female participation'. The word choice is somewhat repetitive, and there are minor errors in collocation. To improve, try to use more academic vocabulary related to data description, such as 'proportion', 'percentage', and 'trend', and ensure you are using the correct word forms (e.g., nouns vs. adjectives).
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'men's ratio was fluctuated' (passive voice error) and 'than men levels were down' (incorrect comparative structure). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of commas. The incomplete sentence at the end further detracts from the grammatical accuracy. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence structures and subject-verb agreement, and practice using comparative forms correctly when describing data.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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