Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-07
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
THE BAR CHART ILLUSTRATES THE PERCENTAGE OF AUSTRALIAN MALE . AND WOMEN IN DIFFERENT AGE GROUPS WHO DID REGULAR PHYSICAL ECTIVITY IN 2010.
IT IS CLEAR THAT FEMALE PHYSICAL ACTIVITY WAS HIGHER THAN MALE . WHEARAS MALE PERCENTAGE OF PHYSICAL ACTIVITY WAS LOWER THAT FEMAL. FEMALE WERE DOING MORE REGULAR PHYSICAL ACTIVITY THAN MALE .
PERCENTAGE SHOWS THAT 53.3% WAS THE HIGHEST PERCENTAGE .WHICH IS BASICALLY DOING FEMALE .FURTHERMORE, THE AGE GROUP FROM 55 TO 64 WAS THE SECOND HIGHEST OF PHYSICAL ACTIVITY DONE BY FEMALE.AND THE LOWEST PERCENTAGE OF FEMALE PHYSICAL ACTIVITY WAS 47.1 PERCENT .IN CONTRAST ,15 TO 24 AGE GROU OF MALE WERE THE HIGHEST RATHER THAN ANY PERCENTAGE OF MEN .WHEREAS ,39 PERCENT IS THE LOWEST OF MALE PHYSICAL ACTIVITY.FOLLOWED BY 47.1 AND 46.7 WAS THE CLOSEST PERCENTAGE OF MALE AND FEMALE .
IT IS CLEAR THAT FEMALE OF ALL AGES DOING EXERCISE REGULARY RATHAR THAT MALE.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to summarise the data but struggles to provide a clear overview or accurate reporting of the main features. While you identify that female participation is generally higher, the specific data points are often confusing or misstated (e.g., '53.3% was the highest percentage... which is basically doing female'). The comparison between age groups is disjointed, and the lack of clear data presentation makes it difficult for the reader to follow the trends. To improve, focus on grouping data logically—perhaps by comparing age categories across genders—and ensure that the figures cited directly correspond to the labels on the chart. You need to provide a more structured summary rather than listing isolated, sometimes inaccurate, statistics.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the logical progression of ideas is weak. The use of cohesive devices is limited and often mechanical or misused, such as the repetitive use of 'It is clear that' and 'Whereas'. The transition between sentences is frequently abrupt, making the text feel like a series of disconnected statements rather than a cohesive report. Referencing is also unclear; for example, the phrase 'which is basically doing female' is grammatically confusing and fails to link back to the data effectively. Improving the use of linking words like 'consequently', 'in contrast', and 'similarly' will help create a smoother flow between your observations.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive. You rely heavily on basic terms like 'percentage', 'highest', and 'lowest'. There are also several instances of word-choice errors and non-standard phrasing, such as 'physical ectivity' (spelling error), 'doing female', and 'age grou'. These errors occasionally impede the clarity of your message. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use a wider range of vocabulary related to data description, such as 'proportion', 'participation rates', 'surpassed', and 'marginal difference'. Additionally, ensure you proofread for basic spelling and word-form errors, as these distract from the quality of your writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that affect readability. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('Female were doing', 'Female of all ages doing'), incorrect word forms ('physical ectivity', 'regularly'), and punctuation errors, such as unnecessary spaces before periods and inconsistent capitalization. The sentence structures are mostly simple, and attempts at more complex sentences often result in errors that obscure the intended meaning. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically subject-verb agreement and correct article usage. Practicing the difference between nouns and adjectives (e.g., 'female' vs 'females') will also significantly improve the accuracy of your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.