Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-09
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The bar graph illustrates the percentage of Australian men and women in six age groups who participated in physical activity in 2010.
Firstly, in the age group between 15 to 24 males were very active and they participate more in physical activities at 52.8 then women were only 47.7, but it started decreased in the age group of 25 to 34 female were did more physical activities at 48.9 then male did only 42.2. Men participation continually decreased in the age group of 35 to 44, 45 to 54 and 55 to 64.
On the other hand, female participation increased in the age group of 35 to 44 around 52.5 and more increased in 45 to 54 around 53.3. But in the elder age men and women participate equally around 46.7 and 47.1.
Overall, in Australia most of the men and women were doing regular physical activities only in 35 to 44 is huge difference in male and female activates.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the chart, such as the age groups and the gender differences. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial and lacks a clear, cohesive overview. While you have selected some data points, the reporting is inconsistent; for instance, you mention specific percentages but fail to clearly contrast the overall trends across the age spectrum. The conclusion is also slightly confusing, as it attempts to summarize but ends with a vague statement about a 'huge difference' without clearly synthesizing the data provided. To improve, ensure you group the data logically and provide a more comprehensive summary of the trends rather than just listing individual figures.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response is organized into paragraphs, which is a positive step. However, the flow between sentences is often mechanical and sometimes confusing. For example, the transition 'but it started decreased' is grammatically awkward and disrupts the logical progression of the comparison. The use of cohesive devices is limited and occasionally repetitive. While the overall structure is discernible, the lack of sophisticated linking words makes the relationship between the data points feel disjointed. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking phrases to connect your ideas more fluidly and ensure that each paragraph has a clear, singular focus.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but remains quite basic. You rely on repetitive phrasing such as 'age group' and 'physical activities'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'female were did more' and 'men and women participate equally'. These errors occasionally make the meaning slightly harder to follow. To improve, try to incorporate more precise vocabulary related to data description, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'remained stable', or 'a significant disparity'. Expanding your range of synonyms and focusing on correct word forms will help you achieve a higher score in this criterion.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors, particularly with verb tenses and subject-verb agreement. Examples include 'males were very active and they participate', 'female were did more', and 'men and women participate equally'. These errors are persistent and sometimes impede the clarity of the information. While you attempt some complex sentence structures, they are often inaccurate. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically ensuring that subjects and verbs agree and that tenses are used consistently throughout the report. Proofreading for these common errors will significantly improve the readability and accuracy of your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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