Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-14
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.0)
The bar graph illustrates the proportion of Australian male and female in various age groups who participated in physical exercise in 2010.
Overall, it can be seen that, the male ratio was highest in the beginning of the age group. However in the end of age it deceased slightly. In addition, the middle aged women recorded the lowest figure in activity.
To begin with, the proportion of youngster whose age is between 15 and 24 was accounted for 52.8%
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 3.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 3.0
The response is significantly under the 150-word minimum requirement, which severely limits your ability to address the task. You have failed to report on the majority of the data provided in the chart, offering only a brief mention of the 15-24 age group. To achieve a higher band, you must provide a comprehensive overview, select and report on key features across all age groups, and make meaningful comparisons between the genders. Currently, the response is incomplete and lacks the necessary detail to fulfill the requirements of an Academic Task 1 report.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The response is too short to demonstrate effective paragraphing or a logical progression of ideas. While you have attempted to use cohesive devices such as 'Overall' and 'To begin with', the text ends abruptly after only two sentences of analysis. There is no clear structure to the report, and the lack of content makes it impossible to assess your ability to organize information or use cohesive devices effectively throughout a full-length response.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.0
The vocabulary used is basic and contains some inaccuracies, such as 'male ratio' instead of 'proportion of males' and 'in the end of age' which is unnatural. You have attempted to use some topic-specific vocabulary like 'proportion' and 'participated', but the limited length of the response prevents you from demonstrating a sufficient range of vocabulary. To improve, focus on using more precise terminology for describing data trends and ensure your collocations are natural.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
There are several grammatical errors in the short text provided. For example, 'the male ratio was highest in the beginning of the age group' is imprecise, and 'the proportion of youngster whose age is between 15 and 24 was accounted for 52.8%' contains a passive voice error ('was accounted for' is incorrect here). The sentence structure is simplistic. You need to focus on using a wider variety of complex structures and ensuring that your basic grammar, such as subject-verb agreement and preposition usage, is accurate.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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