Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-17
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The bar chart illustrates the proportion of Australian males and females in various age groups who participated in regular physical activity in 2010.
Overall, it is evident that men had the highest proportion of participation in the 15–24 age group and lowest in the 24-44 age group, whereas women recorded their highest proportion in the 25–54 age group and lowest in 15-24 age group.
Initially, fluctuations recoded in daily physical activity of men throughout the period. 45 to 54 ages people represented the largest share, at 53.5%. The second-largest were from 15-24 age group. Moreover, from 56 to over showed almost similar proportions which was 46.7% and 45.1%, respectively. Middle age people did lowest physical activity.
Similarly, the proportions of women were relatively higher than men. 45 to 54 age group women had the highest rate of physical activity which was 53.3%, following this middle age women represented second most greatest percentage. The smallest figures were accounted to 65 and over age group which was 47.1%.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response provides a clear overview and selects key features from the chart. However, there are significant inaccuracies in the data reporting. For instance, you state that men had the lowest participation in the 24-44 age group, but the chart shows the lowest for men is in the 65+ category. Similarly, your description of the women's data contains inconsistencies regarding the age groups and percentages. While you attempt to make comparisons, the misinterpretation of the data prevents a higher score. To improve, ensure that you carefully cross-reference your summary with the visual data provided to avoid factual errors.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'Initially', and 'Similarly' to guide the reader. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes hindered by the factual inaccuracies mentioned in the task achievement section. Additionally, some transitions feel slightly mechanical. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the analysis of men and women, which helps the overall structure. To reach a higher band, focus on ensuring that the logical flow is supported by accurate data points, which will make your comparisons more coherent and easier to follow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'proportion', 'participated', and 'fluctuations'. However, there are instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'middle age people did lowest physical activity' and 'second most greatest percentage'. These errors do not impede communication, but they do limit the precision of your writing. To improve, work on using more natural collocations and avoid repetitive structures. Expanding your range of descriptive adjectives and adverbs would also help to better characterize the trends shown in the bar chart.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as '45 to 54 ages people' (should be 'people aged 45 to 54'), 'fluctuations recoded' (should be 'recorded'), and 'from 56 to over showed' (should be 'those aged 56 and over'). These errors are noticeable but do not prevent the reader from understanding the main points. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and correct preposition usage. Proofreading for small errors in tense and word order will help you achieve a more polished and accurate piece of writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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