Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-19
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The bar chart illustrates the percentage of Australian men and women involved in routine physical activity in the year 2010.
Overall, Australian females were more actively performing physical activities compared to mens.
52.8% men in the age bracket of 15-24 were more in physical exercises while the percentage of womens of same age bracket is slightly lower.This comparison started to change with the womens above 24 started more physical activities. between the age of 25 and 34 the percentage of womens is higher with 48.9% and mens with dramatic decline of interest in these type of activities.
Additionally, from the age of 35 till 64 te percentage of womens remain almost constant with over 50% females were doing regular activities physically.On the other hand percentage of mens remain lower than womens between the of 25 a and 64.However, Peoples above the age of 65 in both genders were almost in same numbers doing those physical activities.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the chart, such as the overall trend and specific age group comparisons. However, the analysis is somewhat inconsistent. For instance, the statement that females were more active overall is contradicted by the data for the 15-24 age group, which you correctly identify as higher for men. The description of the 25-64 age range is generally accurate, but the phrasing is occasionally imprecise, such as describing the decline in men's activity as 'dramatic' without clearly referencing the data points. To improve, ensure that your summary of the 'overall' trend is supported by the data and avoid subjective descriptors that are not clearly backed by the figures provided.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, moving from an overview to specific age-based comparisons. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes hindered by mechanical phrasing and minor errors in cohesive devices. For example, the transition 'This comparison started to change with the womens above 24 started more physical activities' is grammatically awkward and disrupts the logical progression. While you use some linking words like 'Additionally' and 'On the other hand', the connection between ideas could be smoother. Improving the variety of cohesive devices and ensuring that referencing (e.g., 'these type of activities') is clear would help elevate the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'bracket', 'constant', and 'percentage'. However, there are several word-choice errors and non-standard collocations, such as 'actively performing physical activities' instead of 'participating in physical activities' and 'mens' instead of 'men'. The repetition of 'percentage of' and 'physical activities' limits the sophistication of your writing. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise collocations and avoiding repetitive phrasing. Additionally, ensure that plural forms are used correctly (e.g., 'women' instead of 'womens').
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'percentage of womens remain'), incorrect pluralization ('womens', 'mens', 'Peoples'), and missing prepositions or articles (e.g., 'between the of 25 a and 64'). While the meaning is generally understandable, these errors are persistent throughout the text. To improve, focus on basic grammatical accuracy, particularly with plural nouns and subject-verb agreement, and try to incorporate more complex structures with greater precision.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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