Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-19
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The bar chat demonstrates the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular exercises in the year 2010.
Overall, it shows that the male proportion from the age between 15 to 24 is just above 50% that is a huge percentage among the others groups and the women make just slight lower than men 47.7%.
Meanwhile, the men of the group 35 to 44 take least part in exercise that is approximately 40% .except the first group, in all groups female make the lead in physical activities.
Take starts from the group 15 to 24 male make 52.8% beside this female make
less than 50%. Next, take the group 25 to 34 the male take upto 42.2% and female gets 48.9%.The group 35 to 44 ,male did 39.5% and women take part 52.5%.
The significant part of this group is the female take the lead in this that is 53,3% and male did 43.1%.In the next group female take lead in nearly 53 %.and the group 65 and over remain approximately same.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
You have successfully identified the main features of the bar chart and made relevant comparisons between genders and age groups. However, the report lacks a clear, structured overview. While you mention some data points, the description of the trends is somewhat disjointed. For instance, the statement 'the men of the group 35 to 44 take least part in exercise' is factually confusing when compared to the data provided. Additionally, the final sentence is vague ('remain approximately same'), which fails to clearly communicate the data for the oldest age group. To improve, ensure you group your data logically and provide a more precise summary of the overall trends rather than just listing individual percentages.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the flow between sentences is often mechanical and sometimes confusing. You use some cohesive devices like 'Meanwhile' and 'Next', but the logical progression is hindered by awkward phrasing and unclear referencing. For example, the transition 'Take starts from the group 15 to 24' is non-standard and disrupts the reader's understanding. Paragraphing is present, but the internal structure of the paragraphs lacks a clear focus, making it difficult to follow the comparison between men and women across the different age categories. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear topic sentence would enhance the coherence.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it is quite repetitive and lacks precision. You frequently use phrases like 'take part' and 'make the lead', which are not the most natural collocations for describing statistical data. There are also some minor errors in word choice, such as 'bar chat' instead of 'bar chart' and 'slight lower' instead of 'slightly lower'. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more varied and precise vocabulary related to trends and comparisons, such as 'proportion', 'participation rates', 'surpassed', or 'remained stable'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
You demonstrate a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Issues include incorrect verb forms ('female make the lead'), missing articles, and punctuation errors (e.g., '53,3%'). There are also problems with sentence construction, such as 'the male proportion from the age between 15 to 24 is just above 50% that is a huge percentage among the others groups'. These errors are noticeable and require attention. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of prepositions will significantly improve the accuracy of your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.