Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-21
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The chart given illustrates the proportion of Australian individuals from different age ranges who participated in regular physical activity in 2010.
Overall, females between ages 45 to 54 had the highest percentages of people who engaged in physical activity.In contrast, male between the ages 15-24 had the highest engagement in physical activity.
In the 15-24 age group, men had the highest participation rate of the total male category.However from age 25 upwards the women outperformed the men, peaking at 53.3% in the 45-54 age brackets.
Male participation dropped to its lowest point of 39.5 % among 35-44-year olds.representing the widest gender gap of participation in the data.By age 65 and over, the men and women had identical participation rates of 46.7% and 47.1 % respectively.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement score. While you have identified the main features and made some comparisons, the analysis is quite brief. You have correctly highlighted the peak for women (45-54) and the gender gap, but the lack of sufficient detail and the failure to reach the minimum length prevents a higher score. To improve, ensure you provide a more comprehensive overview and include more data points or detailed comparisons to fully develop your response.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices like 'In contrast' and 'However', which help the flow. However, the connection between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the paragraphing could be more balanced. The transition between the overview and the body paragraphs is clear, but the overall progression is limited by the brevity of the text. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear, unified focus.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'proportion', 'participated', and 'outperformed'. There are some minor issues with word choice and precision, such as 'age brackets' (plural) when referring to a single range. The vocabulary is generally functional and allows for clear communication, but it lacks the sophistication and flexibility required for higher bands. To improve, try to incorporate more precise academic collocations and avoid repetitive phrasing when describing trends or data points.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as 'In the 15-24 age group, men had the highest participation rate...'. However, there are several grammatical errors, including missing articles ('male between the ages'), punctuation issues (spacing before periods), and inconsistent subject-verb agreement. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to affect the overall quality. To improve, proofread your work specifically for small errors like missing articles and ensure consistent spacing and punctuation throughout your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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