Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-22
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The bar chart illustrates the proportion of men and women in different age of categories doing physical activity in Australia in 2010.
Overall, in adult male was most hieghst activity through out the period. While the age from 45 to 54 female is most prevalent in the chart. In contrast, In 35 to 44 the number was least dthe old ages male and female both were similarly.
Looking at the details, the male from 15 to 24 age accounted was 52.8%, Moreover from the age of 25 to 34 was 42.2%, compared from 35 to 44 age was 39.5%, and finally was stoop in 46.7 the age from 65 and over.
On the other hands, The young female from 15 to 24 was 47.7%. and sharply rose to 39.5 in the age from 35 to 44% , Which is upward trajectory from 55 to 64 age was 45.1%. Finally, from the age of 65 and over the number was 46.7%.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to summarise the data, but it fails to clearly identify the main trends or make meaningful comparisons. The overview is confusing and contains inaccurate statements, such as claiming the 45-54 age group for females was the most prevalent, which is not supported by the data. Furthermore, the description of the data is disjointed and lacks a logical flow. Several figures are misquoted or presented in a way that makes the information difficult to follow. To improve, you must focus on selecting the most significant features—such as the peak age groups for both genders—rather than listing every data point, and ensure your summary accurately reflects the provided chart.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the internal structure is weak. The use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or misused, such as 'On the other hands' and 'Moreover', which do not effectively link the ideas. The progression of information is unclear, and the lack of logical sequencing makes it difficult for the reader to follow the comparison between men and women. Referencing is also problematic, as it is often unclear which age group or gender is being discussed in certain sentences. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear focus would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary range is quite limited and repetitive. There are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward phrasing, such as 'most hieghst activity' and 'stoop in 46.7'. The use of 'upward trajectory' is an attempt at more sophisticated language, but it is used incorrectly in this context. You rely heavily on basic descriptors and struggle to express the data with precision. To reach a higher band, you should practice using a wider variety of verbs and nouns to describe trends (e.g., 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', 'peaked') and ensure that your collocations are accurate.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('in adult male was'), incorrect preposition usage, and sentence fragments. The structure of your sentences is often simplistic, and attempts at complex structures are frequently faulty, such as 'Which is upward trajectory from 55 to 64 age was 45.1%'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the placement of percentages and commas. To improve, focus on basic sentence construction, ensuring that every sentence has a clear subject and verb, and proofread carefully to eliminate basic errors in tense and word order.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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