Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The given bar chart illustrates information about the physical activity done by men and women in Australia of different age group in year 2010.

To commence with, physical activity performed by males from age group of 15-24 were 52.8%. Whereas the percentage of females participant was 47.7% . At the age of 25-34 the percentage of men participant decreased and reached 42.2% and percentage of women participants increased to 48.9%. However percentage of men participants were still low even in the age group of 35-44 . Although, female participation showed an drastic increment into it .

Moving on further to, men and women of age 45-54 were noticed that female take more part in physical activity . Whereas, male take less part with the increasing age. At the age of about 65 and over both genders were taking part in physical activities at almost same percentage.

To conclude, males were more active during there young age . However women were on increasing rate till 65 and over.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response covers the main features of the bar chart, including the age groups and gender comparisons. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. While you identified the starting point (15-24) and the end point (65+), the description of the middle age groups lacks precision and clarity. For instance, stating 'male take less part with the increasing age' is a broad generalization that does not fully capture the specific data trends shown in the chart. To reach a higher band, ensure that you report specific figures more consistently and provide a more analytical overview of the trends rather than just listing data points.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the information. You use some cohesive devices like 'To commence with', 'Moving on further to', and 'To conclude'. However, some of these transitions are slightly unnatural or misused, such as 'Moving on further to, men and women...'. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, making the flow between sentences feel a bit mechanical. Improving the variety and accuracy of your linking words will help the ideas progress more smoothly.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it is somewhat repetitive and lacks precision. You use phrases like 'percentage of men participant' and 'drastic increment into it', which are slightly awkward. There are also some minor errors in word choice, such as 'female take more part' instead of 'females participated more'. To improve, try to use a wider range of synonyms for 'increase', 'decrease', and 'participation' to avoid repetition and demonstrate a more sophisticated command of the language.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors. Examples include 'in year 2010' (missing 'the'), 'age group of 15-24 were 52.8%' (subject-verb agreement error), and 'during there young age' (incorrect homophone 'there' instead of 'their'). These errors are noticeable and occasionally distract the reader, though they do not completely impede communication. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and correct article usage will significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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