Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-27
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Introduction
The bar graph provides information about the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who engaged in regular physical activity in 2010.
Overview
Overall, between the age groups 15 to 24 and 65 and over, females were more actively participating in physical activities compared to males. However, in contrast, with the exception of one age group, in which the proportions of males were higher.
Body Paragraph 1
First half of age groups between 15 to 24 to 35 to 44, the relative percentage of females was higher in comparison to males. In the age group from 15 to 24 the participation of males showed higher percentage of 52.8% in comparison to females which accounted for 47.7%. This trend was reversed in age group from 25 to 34 and 35 to 44, where females dominated males at a percentage of 48.9% and 52.5% respectively, than males which were at 42.2 and 39.5 for the mentioned age group.
Body Paragraph 2
The second half of the age group showed similar trend, the females dominated males in every age group, with a slight difference in the age group 65 and over where females accounted for 47.1% and males were at 46.7%. In terms of 45 to 54 & 55 to 64, the percentages of females were somewhere identical having 53% in one age group between 55 and 64 and 53.3% in the age group between 45 to 54. This percentage were higher in comparison to males having percentage 43.1% and 45.1% respectively for the age group from 45 to 64.
Conclusion
In conclusion, females were exceptionally higher than males in most of the cases, with slight difference in the age group between 50 and over and 15 to 24
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
You have successfully identified the main features of the data and provided relevant comparisons. The overview captures the general trend, although the second sentence is grammatically incomplete and confusing. You have included specific data points to support your descriptions, which is excellent. However, there are some inaccuracies in your reporting; for instance, you state that females dominated in every age group in the second half, but you then note the 65+ group, which contradicts your earlier claim. Additionally, the conclusion mentions '50 and over', which is not a category present in the chart. To reach a higher band, ensure that your data reporting is precise and that your overview clearly synthesizes the main trends without contradictory statements.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the information. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'In contrast' and 'In conclusion', to signal transitions. However, the flow is occasionally hindered by awkward phrasing, such as 'First half of age groups between 15 to 24 to 35 to 44', which is clunky. The referencing is sometimes unclear, particularly in the overview where the second sentence lacks a clear connection to the previous point. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each sentence flows logically into the next would enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'participating', 'dominated', and 'proportions'. However, there is a tendency to use repetitive phrasing, such as 'percentage of' and 'age group'. Some word choices are slightly unnatural, such as 'somewhere identical' instead of 'roughly similar' or 'nearly identical'. There are also minor errors in collocation, such as 'exceptionally higher', which is not the most precise way to describe statistical data. To improve, try to vary your vocabulary by using synonyms and more precise academic collocations to describe trends and comparisons.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. For example, 'This percentage were higher' should be 'These percentages were higher', and 'in which the proportions of males were higher' is a fragment. There are also issues with preposition usage and article omission. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and ensuring that every sentence is complete will significantly improve the accuracy of your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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