Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-29
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The bar graph compares the percentage of Australian male and female of different age groups doing regular physical activities in 2010. It shows that age group of 15 to 24 as compared to 65 and over tend to work alot especially male with 52.8% as compared to female with 47.7%. The age group of 45 to 54 and 55 to 64 shows a similar rise in female percentage in comparison to male percentage of their age group and others. There is a contrast between male and female of age group 15 to 24 and 45 to 54 as it demonstrates that young male and adult female are more drawn to physical activities.
In conclusion, this graph represent that there is fluctuations in physical activities done by male as compared to female whose physical activities by constant at some point and decline in 2010 among the different age groups in Australia.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the chart, such as the 15-24 age group and the general comparison between genders. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial and lacks a clear, data-driven overview. While you mention that young males and adult females are more drawn to physical activities, the description of the data is occasionally vague (e.g., 'work alot'). To improve, ensure you provide more precise comparisons of the percentages across all age groups rather than focusing only on selected categories. The conclusion is also slightly confusing as it mentions 'fluctuations' and 'constant' activity levels, which are not clearly supported by the provided data points.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response is organized into two paragraphs, which is a basic structure. However, the logical progression is hindered by awkward phrasing and a lack of cohesive devices. For example, the transition between the description of age groups and the conclusion is abrupt. The use of referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the sentence 'The age group of 45 to 54 and 55 to 64 shows a similar rise in female percentage in comparison to male percentage of their age group and others.' This makes the relationship between the data points difficult to follow. More varied linking words are needed to improve the flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. Phrases like 'work alot' are too informal for an Academic Task 1 response. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'this graph represent that there is fluctuations' (should be 'represents' and 'are fluctuations'). The range of vocabulary is sufficient to convey basic meaning, but it lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher bands. You should aim to use more academic terminology to describe trends, such as 'proportion,' 'participation rates,' 'significant,' or 'marginal.'
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and some attempted complex structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors. Subject-verb agreement is a recurring issue, for example, 'graph represent' instead of 'graph represents' and 'activities by constant' instead of 'activities were constant.' Additionally, there are errors in pluralization, such as 'male and female' instead of 'males and females.' While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to lower the score. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would significantly improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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