Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-29
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The bar graph shows the information of ratio of physical activities in australia at different age groups of men and women in the year of 2010. The age group is divided into six parts which i will elaborate the information in upcoming paragraphs.
To begin with at the age of 15-24 the male do physical activities around 53% which is slighter more then female. To move further, at the age groups of 25-34 there is a little decrease percentage in men and women did a little higher in this age group. Moreover, age group 35-44 and 45-54 is almost same with not much difference the boys there between 39% to 43% and girls around 52% to 54% at these age groups as well as the final two age groups has also the same situation but in some parts women did a slightly higher physical activities at the age group of 55-64.
After summarise the graph i believe that the strength for doing physical activities with the age groups become low.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response provides a basic overview of the data but fails to highlight the key features effectively. While you mention the age groups, the description of the trends is vague and lacks precision. For example, stating that age groups 35-44 and 45-54 are 'almost same' is not supported by clear data points, and the comparison between men and women is often confusing. To improve, you should select the most significant data points (the highest and lowest percentages) and use them to support your comparisons, rather than attempting to list every group in a narrative style.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical flow is weak. The use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or misused, such as 'To move further' and 'After summarise the graph'. The referencing is also unclear; for instance, the phrase 'the boys there' is informal and imprecise for an academic report. The progression of ideas is hindered by repetitive sentence structures and a lack of clear transitions between the different age categories, making it difficult for the reader to follow the comparison of the data.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. You frequently use basic terms like 'do', 'did', and 'same'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'slighter more then' (should be 'slightly more than') and 'decrease percentage'. The use of 'boys' and 'girls' is inappropriate for an academic task describing adults; 'men' and 'women' should be used consistently. To reach a higher band, you need to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary related to data description, such as 'proportion', 'fluctuate', 'peak', and 'significant'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('the male do', 'women did a little higher'), incorrect verb forms ('After summarise'), and awkward sentence construction. The range of structures is limited, relying mostly on simple sentences. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing commas and run-on sentences. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence structure and ensuring that your verb tenses are consistent when describing data from a past year.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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