Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The bar graph illustrates the proportion different ages Australian male and female cummunite who did everyday physical cariculam in 2010.

Overall, it is evident that females do more physical activities than men, it is clear that age between 45 to 54 women does more exercise than age people.

To start with, the age gap ranges from 15 to 24 men doing 52.8% which is higher than women's 47.7%. The age difference between 25 to 34 women did 48.9% and man did only 42.2%

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the score. Because the text is only 83 words, the information is severely underdeveloped. While you have attempted to identify some main features, such as the comparison between genders in specific age groups, the summary is incomplete. You have not covered all the data points provided in the chart, and the lack of length prevents a full overview or a comprehensive comparison of the trends across all age categories. To improve, you must ensure you describe all key features and provide a more detailed analysis of the data to meet the length requirement.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The response is organized into short paragraphs, which is a positive start. However, the progression of ideas is limited due to the brevity of the text. Cohesive devices are used in a very basic and mechanical way, such as 'To start with' and 'Overall'. There is a lack of sophisticated linking words to connect the comparisons effectively. The referencing is sometimes unclear, such as the phrase 'age people' in the second paragraph, which makes the logical flow difficult to follow. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices and ensure that each paragraph has a clear, well-developed central idea.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The range of vocabulary is quite limited and contains several errors that impede clarity. For example, 'cummunite' is a misspelling of 'community', and 'physical cariculam' is an incorrect collocation for 'physical activity'. The vocabulary used is repetitive and lacks the precision required for an Academic Task 1 response. You rely on basic descriptors and struggle to use academic terminology to describe the data trends accurately. To improve, you should focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary related to charts and graphs, such as 'proportion', 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', or 'peaked', and pay closer attention to spelling and word choice.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that affect readability. There are issues with subject-verb agreement, such as 'women does more exercise' (should be 'women do') and 'man did only' (should be 'men did'). Sentence structures are simple and often lack proper punctuation or correct word order, such as 'proportion different ages Australian male'. There is a lack of complex sentence structures, which limits your ability to demonstrate grammatical range. To improve, focus on basic sentence construction, subject-verb agreement, and the correct use of articles and prepositions. Practicing the formation of complex sentences will also help you achieve a higher band score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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