Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The bar chart compares males and females in various age groups who did regular exercises in 2010.

Overall, both genders revealed a slight difference in the percentages. 53.3% women of 45 to 54 years of age were the most in the age group of 45 to 54, while men were the most in the age group of 15 to 24.

Percentage of men was higher than women who did physical activity of those who were between the age of 15 to 24 in 2010. Those who were 65 years of age and above showed a minimal difference, that is 46.7% men and 47.1% of the opposite gender. Furthermore, female citizens were more than male citizens in all age groups who regularly did activities for staying fit.

Moreover, the percentage of male gender was least of those who were between 35 to 44 years of age. Whereas women were least in the age group of 65 years and above.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers the main features of the chart, but the analysis is inconsistent and contains factual errors. For example, you state that women were the least in the 65+ age group, but the chart shows they were actually the highest percentage in that category. Additionally, the claim that 'female citizens were more than male citizens in all age groups' is inaccurate, as men were higher in the 15-24 and 35-44 age brackets. While you attempt to select key data points, the misinterpretation of the visual information prevents a higher score. To improve, ensure you double-check your data against the graph before writing.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, and there is a basic attempt at logical progression. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or confusing. For instance, the transition 'Moreover' is used to introduce a point that contradicts the previous sentence's logic. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, such as in the phrase 'the opposite gender,' which is a slightly awkward way to refer to the data. The flow between sentences is sometimes disjointed, making the reader work harder to follow the comparison. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring they are used logically will enhance the coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks precision and variety. You rely on repetitive phrasing such as 'age group of' and 'percentage of'. Phrases like 'the opposite gender' and 'male gender' are slightly unnatural in this context. There is an attempt to use some descriptive language, but it is limited. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more varied synonyms for 'percentage' (e.g., 'proportion,' 'figure') and 'did physical activity' (e.g., 'engaged in regular exercise,' 'participated in fitness activities').

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors. For example, '53.3% women of 45 to 54 years of age were the most in the age group' is syntactically awkward. There are also issues with article usage and prepositional phrases, such as 'the percentage of male gender was least of those who were between 35 to 44'. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to affect the overall fluency of the text. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and more precise sentence construction will help.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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