Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-07
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The bar graph depicts the proportion of Australian men and women in different age forms who did daily physical work in the year 2010.
The units are measured in percentage.
overall, the bar graph highlights that the young male physical activity is surge . moreover, adults male exercise is less.
the interesting point is that old age group has quite same proportion .
in the one hand, the bar graph compares to opposite genders which shows their interest in physical health .
it is observed that the youth is more active in physical strength activity such as, from the age group 15 to 24 the amount of male proportion is more when compared to female which is 52.8%.
furthermore, the male interest is declined from age of 25 to 65 .
In the other hand, the adulthood female as surge in the age groups such as , 25to34, 45 to 54, 55to64, 65 and over . however, 35 to 44 age group female percentage declined when compared to other age groups .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the bar chart, such as the high participation of young males and the general trends across age groups. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial and lacks precision. For example, the statement that 'adults male exercise is less' is vague, and the description of female trends is confusingly phrased. The response identifies some key comparisons, but the data reporting is inconsistent, and the overall summary lacks a clear, cohesive overview of the most significant differences between genders. To improve, ensure that data points are cited accurately and that trends are described with more clarity and logical grouping.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. The use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or incorrect, such as 'in the one hand' and 'In the other hand', which are misused. Referencing is also unclear at times, making it difficult to follow the comparison between genders. While there is an attempt to use linking words, they are not always used appropriately to connect ideas effectively. The paragraphing is present but does not fully support the logical flow of the information presented.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and sometimes inaccurate. Phrases like 'age forms' instead of 'age groups' and 'daily physical work' instead of 'regular physical activity' indicate a lack of precision. There is also repetitive use of basic words like 'amount' and 'proportion'. While the meaning is generally conveyed, the range of vocabulary is insufficient to demonstrate a higher level of control. To reach a higher band, you should focus on using more precise terminology related to data description and avoiding word-choice errors that hinder the professional tone of the report.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('male interest is declined'), incorrect article usage, and awkward sentence structures ('the young male physical activity is surge'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with unnecessary spaces before commas and periods. While there is an attempt to use complex structures, they are often faulty. The majority of sentences contain errors, which prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focus on basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like verb tense and article usage.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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