Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-09
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The provided bar chart compares the percentage of Australian men and women doing regular physical activity in 2010.
Overall, from 45 to54 age group of females had the highest percentage of physical activist's while from 35 to 44 age group of males recorded the lowest percentage of physical activities whereas others age group of male and female was a moderate percentage of physical activity despite some fluctuation throughout the period.
At the beginning, from 15 to 24 age group, male stood at 52.8% while women started physical activity at around 47.77%. After that, male physical activity declined slightly to around 42.2% and reached at about 39.5% between 35 to 44 ages. In contrast, female phsical activity also declined at about 48.9% from 25 to 34 age group. however this trend rose significantly at around 52.5% between 35 to 44 ages.
On the other hand, from 45 to 54 age group of male physical activity increased than previous age group to around 43.1% whereas female increased slightly approximately 53.3% but it continued decline shortly in 64 ages then reached at about 47.1% from 65 and over ages. Although male activity declined previous year, it increased slowly and peak at around 46.7% from 65 and over age group.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response provides a clear overview and identifies key trends across the age groups. You successfully selected and reported the main features, such as the peak for females in the 45-54 age group and the low point for males in the 35-44 age group. However, some data points are slightly inaccurate or confusingly phrased, such as the reference to '64 ages' and the description of the 65+ category. While you made relevant comparisons, the analysis could be more precise by consistently grouping the data to highlight the differences between genders more effectively. Overall, the task is addressed well, but greater precision in data reporting would elevate the score.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs detailing the trends. You use some cohesive devices like 'In contrast', 'On the other hand', and 'Although', which help the flow of information. However, some transitions are mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the phrase 'others age group of male and female was a moderate percentage'. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the internal structure of the sentences sometimes hinders the smooth flow of information. Improving the variety and accuracy of linking words would enhance the coherence.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuation', 'declined', and 'significantly'. However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward phrasing, such as 'physical activist's' (instead of 'physical activity') and 'reached at about' (instead of 'reached about'). Some vocabulary is repetitive, and there are minor spelling issues. To reach a higher band, you should focus on more precise collocations and avoid using non-standard terms. The current range is sufficient to convey the main points, but precision is lacking in several areas.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt to use complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with prepositions ('reached at about'), articles, and subject-verb agreement ('others age group... was'). There are also issues with tense consistency and word order. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be noticeable. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and ensuring that complex structures are used accurately without unnecessary errors in punctuation or grammar.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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