Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The chart is about the percentage of australian male and female variety of age roups perform exercise in 2010.

overal,in age of 15 to 24 the male did regular exercise which is 52.8% the highest then age of men increase the percentage is fluctuate till the age of 65.and the percentage of women is steadly increase as the age increase.

In the age of 15 to 24 men performing regular activites which is approximitly 53% while women in 48%.from 25 to 64 the women perform more regular activites as compare to men.

At the age of 65 and over from 65 male and female have same percentage of doing regular physical activites.at the Age of 35 to 44 there is big gape of percentage between men and women physicall execrise.bar chart show that female percentage of exercise is moving upward and then constant from 44 to 64 .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5

The response attempts to cover the main features of the chart, noting trends such as the peak for men aged 15 to 24 and the general pattern for women. However, it fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, coming in at 148 words. Furthermore, some data points are misreported or vague, such as stating that at the age of 65 and over male and female have the same percentage when the chart shows 46.7% for males and 47.1% for females. The overview is poorly formed and lacks clarity in summarising the overarching trends. Due to the length penalty and inaccuracies in reporting data, this criterion is placed at Band 4.5.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5

The text is divided into short paragraphs, but the overall organisation lacks logical progression and cohesive flow. Sentences are strung together with weak transitions and punctuation errors, such as missing capital letters and periods in the middle of sentences (e.g., 'overal,in age of 15 to 24...'). Paragraphing is poorly handled, and referencing within the text is often unclear or repetitive. Cohesive devices are either missing or misused, resulting in a disjointed reading experience. While the general topic is maintained throughout, the mechanical and faulty cohesion corresponds to Band 4.5 descriptors.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with frequent misspellings and incorrect word forms (e.g., 'australian', 'roups', 'overal', 'steadly', 'approximitly', 'activites', 'gape', 'physicall', 'execrise'). The student attempts some topic-specific vocabulary related to age groups and percentages, but the high density of spelling mistakes and awkward word choices ('variety of age roups perform exercise', 'big gape') restricts the lexical range and causes strain for the reader. This falls squarely within the Band 4.5 descriptors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The response displays a very limited range of grammatical structures. Simple sentences dominate, and attempts at more complex constructions are frequently faulty and ungrammatical (e.g., 'as the age increase', 'men performing regular activites which is approximitly 53%'). There are pervasive errors in punctuation, capitalization, and subject-verb agreement. Errors are frequent and often obscure the meaning, making it difficult for the reader to follow the intended message. Consequently, the grammatical accuracy reflects Band 4.0 performance.

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