Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The bar chart illustrates the percentage of daily physical activities in Australia in 2010. It shares the data about various age groups of men and women. It includes the age groups between 15 and over 65. The age groups are divided into 6 parts i.e., 15 to 24, 25 to 34 and 35 to 44 etc.

In the first age group, the 15 years are about 52.8% while 24 years are approximately 47.7%. The second group is of 25 years which is 42.2% while 34 years are 48.9%. Third group is in between 35 and 44. The first is about 39.5 while the other is about 52.5%.

The fourth group, 45 years is 43.1% while 54 years is 53.3%. The fifth group between 55 and 64 years. First one is 45.1 while other is 53. The last group is between 65 and over than it. 65 years are about 46.7% by contract, over than it about 47.1%.

In conclusion, the percentage of male substantially lower down after the 15 years group. It commences from 52.8% and ended at 47.1%. Somehow, women percentage for physical activities slightly upward. It starts from 47.7% and ends at 53% and in the last it also became same about 47.1%

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5

The student attempts to summarize the chart, but there are fundamental misinterpretations of the data. For instance, the text repeatedly treats individual age numbers as separate data points rather than representing age brackets (e.g., writing about 'the 15 years' and '24 years' separately). Additionally, the overview in the conclusion contains inaccurate trends, claiming the male percentage substantially lowered down while misreading the final values. Although all major groups are mentioned, the lack of accurate data interpretation, failure to make meaningful comparisons, and flawed grouping prevent the response from achieving a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The response is divided into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. The introduction spends too much time explaining how the age groups are divided rather than outlining the main features. Within the body paragraphs, sentences are fragmented and disjointed, making it difficult to follow the comparison between men and women. Cohesive devices are minimal and often misused (e.g., 'by contract' instead of 'in contrast'). Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal structure of each paragraph lacks clear thematic unity.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

Vocabulary usage is basic, repetitive, and heavily constrained. The student relies on simple terms and frequently misuses lexical items or collocations, such as 'daily physical activities' instead of 'regular physical activity', and 'lowered down' instead of 'decreased' or 'declined'. There are also awkward phrasings like 'over than it about 47.1%'. While the vocabulary is adequate to convey a minimal sense of the topic, frequent inaccuracies and a lack of less common lexical items restrict the score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The response displays a very limited range of sentence structures, relying heavily on simple sentences and repetitive formulas (e.g., 'The second group is of... while...'). There are frequent grammatical errors, including missing verbs, incorrect prepositions, and structural incompleteness (e.g., 'Third group is in between 35 and 44. The first is about 39.5 while the other is about 52.5%'). These errors and the lack of complex sentence control frequently impede clear communication and understanding.

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