Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-25
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The given bar chart illustrates the portion of Australian man and females in various categories who did daily physical activity in 2010.
Overall, it is crystal clear that the majority woman should did regular exercises compared to men, except youngster. While, the least man age group was 35 to 44. The figure measurements was recorded in percentage.
After analyzing data the youngsters were showed more interest in daily physical activity, it were stood at 52.8%, after that this figure roughly decreased in the next 2 age groups which was 42.2% and 39.5% for 25 to 34 and 35 to 44 respectively. Finally, in the last three categories percentages were showed slightly rise and reached around 46.7% in the last group 65 and over.
Furthermore, the women percentage was started from 47.7% for 15 to 24 age group which was a least doing physical activity compared to other age groups, then the age group 25 to 36 percentage was 48.9. In the next, the portion was reamed grew and reached 53% in 55 to 64. lastly, the trend was drop down in the last group which was approximatly 47.1%.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The student attempts to address the prompt by summarising the main features of the bar chart regarding Australian physical activity in 2010. However, the overview sentence contains factual inaccuracies and confusion (e.g., stating 'the majority woman should did regular exercises compared to men, except youngster'). While some data points for males and females are reported—such as the peak for young males at 52.8% and the female trends—the overall summary is poorly articulated and misinterprets several comparative aspects of the chart. For instance, the prompt data shows that females generally had higher participation in older age groups, but the expression of this is confused. Consequently, the task is only partially addressed.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The response is divided into paragraphs, which provides a basic visual structure. However, logical progression is frequently disrupted by awkward transitions, mechanical cohesive devices (such as 'After analyzing data' and 'Finally'), and unclear referencing. Sentences often feel disjointed, and the relationships between ideas are hard to follow. For example, the transition from the general overview paragraph into the specific body paragraphs lacks smoothness, and cohesive ties within sentences are often misused or omitted, hindering the overall flow.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
The lexical range is limited and severely impacted by word formation and spelling errors. The student repeatedly uses incorrect word forms, such as 'portion of Australian man and females' instead of 'proportion of Australian men and women', 'dailly physical activity' (implied daily/regular), and 'reamed grew' instead of 'continued to grow'. Vocabulary choices are quite basic, and attempts to use less common vocabulary (e.g., 'approximatly') result in mechanical and inaccurate expressions that occasionally cause strain for the reader.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0
Grammatical control is weak throughout the response, featuring a high frequency of basic errors. Examples include tense and modal verb confusion ('should did regular exercises', 'the youngsters were showed'), passive/active voice mix-ups ('the figure measurements was recorded', 'percentages were showed slightly rise'), and incorrect prepositional use. Simple sentence structures dominate, and attempts at more complex structures almost invariably result in ungrammatical formulations. These errors frequently impede communication and require the reader to guess the intended meaning.
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