Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-27
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
Here in the illuatration the different age group of man and women are shown those are doing exercise.
First group is age between 15 to 24. In this age group male percentage is 52.8, which is higher than the women which has percentage of 47.7. Next age group is 25 to 34 this schenario is completely different from pervious age group.In this 39.5 percent of men are doing physical exercise, which is less than the women which has percentage of 48.9.
Age group 45 to 54 has similar outcome. Total men doing exercise has percentage of 43.1 w anhile women has percentage of 53.3. Similarly age group of 55 to 64 has similar results, where the percentage of men is 45.1, while the women has percentage of 53.
Lastly the age group of 65 and above has completely different schenario. Men and women has similar rate of exercise. Men has percentage of 46.7, while women have 47.1 percents that are doing exercise.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response attempts to cover the main features of the chart, reporting data for several age groups such as 15 to 24, 25 to 34, and 65 and above. However, there is a notable omission of a clear overview, which is a key requirement for Task 1. Furthermore, the selection of data is somewhat erratic; for instance, the student skips the 35 to 44 age group entirely in the body paragraphs (despite it showing the peak for females at 52.5%), and the reporting of percentages contains minor inaccuracies (e.g., stating for the 45-54 group that 'total men doing exercise has percentage of 43.1 w anhile women has percentage of 53.3', missing the 35 to 44 category). Because the response fails to provide an effective overview and misses significant trends, it falls into Band 5.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The essay is organised into basic paragraphs, with an introduction and separate body paragraphs for different age groups. However, the progression of ideas is hindered by repetitive phrasing ('Next age group is...', 'Next age group of...', 'Age group... has similar outcome') and the absence of a proper overview paragraph to link the data cohesively. Cohesive devices are very basic and sometimes mismanaged, with abrupt transitions between ideas. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, such as the sudden jump from the 24 age bracket to the 34 bracket without smoothly connecting the contrasting male and female trends. Paragraphing is attempted but lacks the logical flow expected at higher bands.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.0
The vocabulary used is very basic and repetitive ('percentage', 'men', 'women', 'doing physical exercise'). There are numerous spelling and typographical errors throughout the text, such as 'illuatration', 'man' (instead of men), 'schenario' (used twice for scenario), 'pervious', 'w anhile' (while). The student attempts to use some task-specific vocabulary, but the range is limited and inadequate for precision. Word choices are heavily reliant on repeating the prompt's terms, and the frequent spelling errors cause some strain for the reader, placing the lexical performance at a Band 4 level.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0
The response demonstrates a very limited range of sentence structures, relying primarily on simple sentences and repetitive subject-verb-number constructions (e.g., 'In this age group male percentage is...', 'Men has percentage of...'). There are frequent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('Men and women has', 'women have... percents that are doing'), missing articles, and awkward phrasing ('those are doing exercise'). Complex structures are rarely attempted, and when simple sentences are combined, punctuation and conjunctions are misused. These frequent errors impede smooth reading and demonstrate weak control over basic grammatical forms.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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