Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-28
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.0)
This chat shows the percent of Australia men and women of different age group that engage in regular physical activities in the year 2010.
The Australia men of 15 to 24 had the highest percentage in 2010, while the men ageing from 35 to 44 years old had the lowest physical activity in 2010.
The Austrian women with the age of 45 to 54 recorded the highest physical activity in the year 2010, then the women that same year had the lowest physical activity from 65 years and over.
My observation from the same year 2010 had in increase in physical activity for male from 35 to 44 years and the they still had a follow up from the Australia men in 2010 from 15 to 24 years, still recording there was a little increase from the women ageing from 15 to 24 and 65 and over in the same year.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5
The response attempts to summarise the bar chart by identifying some highs and lows, such as noting that men aged 15 to 24 had the highest percentage in 2010. However, there are significant factual inaccuracies in reading the data. For instance, the text claims that men aged 35 to 44 had the lowest physical activity, whereas the chart shows that group at 39.5%, while the 25 to 34 group was actually lower at 42.2% (and 35-44 is the lowest for males, but the text misses several key overall comparisons). Furthermore, the data reporting becomes confused and incoherent in the final paragraph ('My observation from the same year 2010 had in increase...'). While the student attempts an overview and selects main features, the flawed data extraction and lack of a clear, coherent summary pull the score down to Band 4.5.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0
The essay is broken into short, single-sentence paragraphs, which fails to organise ideas logically into a cohesive structure. There is a lack of overall progression, and the final paragraph is extremely difficult to follow due to confusing referencing and abrupt leaps in thought ('then the women that same year had the lowest physical activity from 65 years and over'). Cohesive devices are either missing or misused, with repetitive phrasing such as 'in the year 2010' appearing multiple times awkwardly. Paragraphing is not used effectively to group related information about male and female participation trends. This places the response firmly at Band 4.0 for coherence and cohesion.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.0
The vocabulary used is very basic and repetitive, frequently relying on simple terms like 'percentage', 'men', 'women', and 'physical activity'. There are also several lexical errors and inappropriate word choices, such as 'This chat' instead of 'This chart', 'Australia men' instead of 'Australian men', and 'Austrian women' instead of 'Australian women'. The range of vocabulary is limited and insufficient to discuss the data with precision or flexibility. Spelling of basic terms is mostly intact, but word formation and collocations are weak, justifying a Band 4.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0
The response demonstrates a very limited range of grammatical structures. Most sentences are simple or attempt complex forms that result in severe errors and ungrammatical strings, particularly in the final sentence: 'My observation from the same year 2010 had in increase in physical activity for male from 35 to 44 years and the they still had a follow up from the Australia men in 2010...'. Errors in article usage, pluralisation ('male' instead of 'males'), prepositions, and verb forms are frequent and often distort the intended meaning, making parts of the text extremely difficult to parse. This corresponds to a Band 4.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.